


the intimacy of being understood

by snickiebear



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, BAMF Haruno Sakura, Doctor Haruno Sakura, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Found Family, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Happy Ending, Haruno Sakura-centric, Hatake Kakashi-centric, Healing, Light Angst, Tattoos, Team as Family, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, detective hatake kakashi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-12 16:27:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28763313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snickiebear/pseuds/snickiebear
Summary: “How many ghosts haunt you?”“There are too many to count.”OrTwo people, surrounded by loss and grief, slowly but surely save each other.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura & Inuzuka Kiba, Haruno Sakura & Nara Shikamaru, Haruno Sakura & Sai, Haruno Sakura & Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura & Yamanaka Ino, Haruno Sakura/Hatake Kakashi, Hatake Kakashi & Kakashi's Ninken, Hatake Kakashi & Maito Gai | Might Guy, Hatake Kakashi & Shiranui Genma, Hatake Kakashi & Yamato | Tenzou
Comments: 35
Kudos: 90





	the intimacy of being understood

**Author's Note:**

> hello! this is my first fic on here, it is 10000% self indulgent. i don't know anything about the medical field or how the majority of the legal proceedings are. sorry if the characterizations aren't to your liking, whoopsies. feel free to leave a comment or kudos!  
> happy reading :)

They met at the graveyard.

It was storming out, the wind screaming in her ears as she kneeled in front of her family’s graves, hoping to whatever was out there that lightning struck her, that something put her out of her misery. 

Three months.

They have been gone for three months.

Her loving and nurturing family. 

Her sweet mother who was nothing but supportive when her daughter decided she wanted to try out mixed martial arts and later did it competitively.

Her intelligent and witty father who always knew how to make her laugh through her tears during her most stressful times as a med—student.

Her knuckleheaded and sweet hearted little brother who always made her so angry and yet made her smile the largest. 

Gone. As simple as that. One car accident and they were gone. Dead on arrival.

Sakura sobbed harder, clutching herself as if trying to keep herself together. 

(She never did learn to not pick up broken glass.) 

She watched through the deafening rain as the orchids she had placed on the graves were torn away. 

She shook and shivered, her breath coming too fast or too slow. She couldn’t think, couldn’t feel. None of this felt right, none of this could be _real_ . What kind of _fucked_ up world did they live in where loving, good people were torn away? 

And then, the rain stopped. 

Not really, because she could still feel the biting winds and hear the sounds of the storm. She opened her swollen eyes slowly and looked up, blinking several times. A man towered above her, just as soaked as she was, silver hair plastered to his head, a black mask dripping as he looked down at her, onyx eyes kind but distant. Understanding. 

“You’ll get sick.” Was all he said, his voice deep and smooth, his eyes crinkling slightly in what she guessed was a smile. 

Sakura stared up at him, before looking back at the graves. They wouldn’t have wanted her to get sick because of them, they wouldn’t have wanted her to spend all her freetime here. 

_You have things to do, silly girl._ Her mother would murmur with a gentle pat.

_You have hearts to break! You have lives to save! Get off your ass and make a change Blossom._ Her father would tease.

_Stop being a little bitch and show them who the fuck you are._ Her brother would snap. 

She clenched her jaw as she picked herself up, swallowing thickly. “Thank you,” She murmured, glancing up at him. “I’m sorry if I interrupted your time with your loved one,” 

The man only shook his head, seeming to look at her, but not really. _A ghost_ , her mind supplied. _like me_. 

“I’m Sakura,” She introduced, her face flushing slightly as he continued to study her. She wrapped her arms around herself again. She should be getting home…Naruto and Ino would be worried if they hadn’t already called the cavalry. 

“Kakashi,” The man offered, “I can walk you to you car if you’d like,”

Sakura blinked then looked at her shoes, wiping at her face. “Oh, um, no. I’m already wet as it is, so it won’t make a difference,” She looked up at him, craning her neck. He had a scar over his left eye. “But thank you very much, Kakashi,” She added, forcing a slight smile. 

Kakashi shrugged and turned to leave, “Have a nice evening, Sakura.” 

She hurried to her car after Kakshi had walked off, mind still reeling. Sakura hadn’t seen him before, at least she didn’t think so. But the way he had said her name… as if he already knew who she was. _Understanding,_ she thought again and then pushed the feeling away. 

Sakura sighed, turning on the heat as she stripped of her soaking clothes, kicking off her muddied sneakers and grabbing her phone from the passenger seat. 

24 missed calls and 157 unread text messages. 

Fuck.

She called Ino first, cringing at the berating she was bound to get. 

. . .

Ino, Naruto, Kiba, Sai, and Shikamaru were all waiting at her apartment when she got there, shuffling into the hallway wrapped in a wrinkled trench coat. It had been her dad’s. His favorite. It still smelled like him and she desperately did not want to cry again. 

“Hey Forehead.” Ino murmured first, stepping up to wrap an arm around her shoulders. 

Naruto followed suit and kissed her forehead, pulling her in for a tight hug. “You had us worried.” He whispered into her frizzing hair. 

She pulled away and offered a small smile before looking at everyone else, “Sorry guys… I was at the graveyard,”

Shika just sighed, but there was tension in his shoulders despite his relaxed pose, “I told you guys that’s where she would be.” 

Kiba huffed, eyeing Sakura before looking back at Shika, crossing his arms, “Yeah yeah we get it, you’re all knowing,”

Sakura shook her head as they continued to bicker, going ahead to unlock the apartment as everyone let themselves in. Sakura’s place was a second home to the group, they all had some type of clothing in her drawers, called dibs on certain mugs, and they all had their own keys. She even stocked up on their favorite chips, beers and wines. 

Going ahead to her room, Sakura threw her soaking clothes into a corner before grabbing a tank top, sweats, and her towel, heading to take a shower. She stopped short when she noticed how quiet it was in the living room, the roll of thunder shaking the dishes slightly. 

“Everything okay?” She called, hating how hoarse her voice sounded. 

There was a beat of silence before Ino was there, hands on her hips. “Go shower Forehead, we’ll take care of food, yeah?”

“I brought movies!” Naruto hollered, making Sakura shake her head fondly. 

Ino laid a hand on Sakura’s shoulder, a concerned glint in her eye, “Sakura, you know we’re all here for you. We… we don’t truly know what you’re going through, but we love you. So, if you need anything, you know you have us.”

Sakura just nodded weakly before turning to shower. 

She spent the rest of the night with Naruto’s head in her lap, Kiba’s arm around her. Ino sat on the ground, her head leaning on Sakura’s knee with Sai on the other side. Shika just held her hand, squeezing every now and then. 

Sakura felt warm and safe and loved. But not happy. Not whole. Not alive. It was as if she was an empty shell, a glass that was filling with water but had cracks that were invisible to the eye. 

She fell asleep and dreamed of black eyes and gray storm clouds. 

. . .

She ended up getting sick. 

Groaning, her head feeling as if it was splitting in half, Sakura sat up groggily, looking around blankly. 

“Oh Hag, you’re up.” 

Sakura muttered something under her breath, glaring at Sai, “What time is it?”

“Seven. Everyone had to leave but they all said they would check on you. Ino made me promise to keep an eye on you. You scared everyone.”

Sakura rubbed at her eyes, eyeing Sai as he came closer, offering a glass of water and some painkillers. She murmured a thank you before falling back into her pillows. 

“I’m making pancakes,”

“The ones with the smiley faces and chocolate chips?”

“Yes, those are your favorite.”

She called Tsunade who just tsked and said it was about time she took some time off. “You don’t have any surgeries coming up, take the week off. I don’t want to see your ass at the hospital, got it brat?” There was a pause before her boss added, “Get some sleep Haruno, you fucking deserve it.” Then she hung up. 

Sakura dragged her ass out of bed, pulling on a sweatshirt before trudging into her kitchen and sitting at one of the island seats. She rested her head on the cool countertop as she watched Sai move around her kitchen, a pink apron tied around his waist as he waved the spatula around.

“Why did you stay?”

He glanced over his shoulder, assessing her before turning back to the batter, “Because I’m told that is what friends do. You are one of my best friends and we’re all very worried about you.”

She sighed, rubbing at her temples, “Sai, like I’ve told everyone else I’m fi—”

“Friends aren’t supposed to lie, Sakura.” Sai spoke in his usual monotone but his voice was firm, almost snappy. “You go days without speaking to anyone now. You do not go out unless it is to the cemetery or the hospital. I know you’ve lost weight, you do not sleep. It isn’t healthy.”

Sakura squeezed her eyes shut, unsure of what the fuck to say. She knew it was bad, she had never truly learned to cope with death in the first place. The first time a patient died on her table she had been a wreck for weeks, lost her edge and focus as a surgeon. Every damn time she lost someone she would spiral. So how the hell was she supposed to cope with the loss of her _entire_ _family_? How could she even come to terms with it? She wiped angry tears from her face, heart clenching painfully.

“I know.” She decided on, voice cracking. “I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do.”

A plate piled high with pancakes landed in front of her, “Eat and then brush your teeth because I can smell your witch breath from here. And then, we can talk.” 

Sakura’s lips twitched slightly and she could have sworn Sai looked slightly relieved as she forked a piece of pancake into her mouth. 

. . .

He did not end up getting sick.

Which was a miracle in itself because when he walked into work (three hours late as usual) he was met with a brand new case. A recent string of murders, two men, three women all found in a mass grave. All died from the same thing; suffocation. They were buried alive. 

Genma grinned at him, "Been awhile since we've had a challenge," 

Kakashi frowned from behind his mask, slouching in his chair as he flipped through the file. "Wait."

"What, old man?" 

"First off, you're older than I am," Kakashi grouched before he was out of his seat, striding towards the board that was set up in the bullpen. He pointed to the picture of the footprints they had as Genma came up behind him. Then to the pearl necklace they had found that matched the bracelet on one of the women.

“Did they run a tox screen on the victims?” Kakashi asked quietly, gripping the file tightly.

Shiranui swore filthily when he saw it. "Fuck." He muttered, " _Fuck_." Genma had his phone to his ear, "I'm gonna let the Chief know," 

Kakshi could only nod, glancing outside as it began to pour just like yesterday. Hopefully that woman wasn't out there again, the one with the empty and lost eyes. _A ghost_ , He thought, _like me._

He looked back at the board, snapping the file shut as he pushed away the memories. Obito's smile, Rin's laugh, his father's gentleness, Minato's eyes. "Everything," Kakahi murmured, looking at the mugshot of their killer, "Comes back to you." 

. . .

They met again at the hospital.

He rode in with a gunshot victim in critical condition. Five shots to the chest and stomach. 

“ _I need OR 3 ready_ !” Sakura barked, swinging her leg over the man, straddling him as she started compressions. “ _Now_!”

She didn’t have the time nor the luxury to check on Kakashi, to see what the hell was going on. Her mind was sharp, focused on her patient in front of her. 

_Stop the bleeding. Stabilize the patient. Save a life._

She would learn later that the man she saved, after a fifteen hour surgery, was Kakashi’s partner, Genma. They were detectives that were gunned down while making an arrest. The police had taken care of the problem while their leading detectives were rushed to the hospital. 

Genma had taken the brunt of the injuries, Kakashi having broken his right arm in three different places while sporting some very nasty bruises and a concussion. 

Sakura slumped into a chair, legs finally giving out as she stripped off the bloodied gloves, glancing into Genma Shiranui’s room as his monitor beeped steadily. There was a type of exhausted pride she felt after each successful surgery, her blood sang while her eyes wanted to close. 

It was the most peaceful she had felt in four months. 

A hand clamped down on her shoulder, making her jump and whirl around to face two blazing black eyes. She stared up at him, blinking several times as she gaped before she was on her feet, hissing, “You need to be in be—” 

Kakashi ignored her, his hand tightening on her shoulder, staring into Genma’s room, “Is he going to make it?” His voice was rough and deep and brimming with repressed emotion. 

Sakura softened, placing a hand on his. She studied his face, the unmasked terror in his eyes while his expression was carefully blank. A man who was used to people dying. Someone who expected it at every turn. 

Understanding, she mused, was a very hard thing to come by. But when it did, it struck hard and long.

“Yes. Yes, he’s stable. He’s going to be in recovery for a while, but he’ll make it.” She pried his hand off her shoulder, taking him by the wrist to lead him back to his own room. 

The tension seemed to lessen at that news, shoulders sagging every so lightly. " _Thank you_." 

Ignoring the thanks she strode towards his room, shaking her head. “You were _shot at_ . You have a _concussion_.” She muttered, glaring over her shoulder while Kakashi looked at her in slight amusement. “I literally do not understand how you’re walking around,”

She was just glad that Genma hadn't been hit anywhere important. Sakura grimaced at the thought, watching as Kakashi lazily made his way to the hospital bed, wincing as he laid down. 

“Mah Sakura, I hate hospitals, never know if I’m not gonna make it out,” 

Sakura stiffened at that, a slight shiver running up her spine but she nodded. She understood that fear, it was prominent with law enforcement. “Get some rest Kakashi. You’ll be discharged tomorrow,” 

She turned to leave, running a hand through her hair as she stumbled, exhaustion finally catching up to her. Her shift would end soon but she didn't trust herself to drive… and the bunk beds were three stories above her...

“There’s a recliner here. I wouldn’t mind if you stayed.” 

Sakura turned to look at him in tired amusement. Well… it was better than dragging herself across the hospital. “I hope you aren’t a pervert, Detective Hatake,” She had peeked at his clipboard, sue her. “I did competitive mixed martial arts until I was twenty—one, number one in my bracket and reigning champ.”

Kakashi chuckled, adjusting his mask on his face and she found herself wondering who he let see under it. “You’ll have to show me sometime Dr. Haruno,”

Sakura rolled her eyes at the title, glancing out in the busy hallway once more before she settled into the recliner, pulling the lever so she was in a more comfortable position. Without her consent, her eyes began to droop, a yawn interrupting her thoughts. “Not with that arm. Try again in three months.”

She was out within seconds, but not before hearing his quiet chuckle. 

. . .

Tsuande came storming in at one point, Kakashi mindlessly staring at the ceiling, while his temples throbbed, when he heard her footsteps. 

She burst through the door, opening her mouth to yell at him, but he cut her off, narrowing his eyes and nodding to the sleeping woman in the corner. Tsuande's eyes grew wide with a bit of surprise before she moved quietly to his side, flicking his good arm. Kakashi winced, glaring at her.

"I hope you aren't trying to seduce my best surgeon." She whispered, eyeing the bandages and the sling. "You and Genma must have death wishes." 

Kakashi would have shrugged if it didn't hurt like a fucking bitch, he opted to not comment on the second part, he would only get yelled at more. "Here I was thinking you were the best," 

Rolling her eyes, Tsuande pulled up another chair, "That girl has a gift, picked her right out of med school and trained her myself." She eyed Kakashi with sharp, golden eyes, "How do you know her?" 

Kakashi sighed through his nose, "Graveyard." 

He prepared himself for more chatsitying but it never came. He found his old friend staring at the doctor who had saved his partner’s life, something akin to worry in her eyes. “She’s a lot like you,” Tsuande murmured, reaching a hand out to squeeze Kakashi’s good one. “Did you get him?”

A beat of silence. Kakashi’s skin itched, his stomach clenched. 

“Yes.”

“How do you feel?”

He looked away from her, squeezing his eyes shut almost painfully. The throb at his temples only grew worse as he rasped, “The same. Everything feels the fucking same.” Kakashi clenched his jaw, swallowing thickly, “Years spent chasing him, tearing down his underworld… it all led up to this and nothing changed, Tsunade. He’s in custody and the entire time he looked so fucking smug…”

It was quiet except for the even breathing of Sakura in the recliner.

A hand settled on his shoulder and he forced his eyes open to look at his sister, her eyes kind and understanding (but in the way that meant she _understood_ ). “Get some rest, Kakashi. Go talk to them when this is all sorted out. Come talk to me after.”

And with that, Kakashi was left in silence.

It was never ending, it was always quiet. He missed the noise. He missed the laughs, the hugs. He missed bright smiles and kisses on his cheeks. He missed being fucking _alive_. 

Kakashi pressed his fingers to his eyes as he did his best to stop his tears. 

The silence was the worst part of being a ghost. 

(He never did go back to talk to her, he can’t bear being in hospitals. Too many ghosts.)

. . . 

They saw each other at the graveyard again.

She was sitting in the same place that he had found her the first time, this time with a blanket spread and a bag full of food. Flowers were settled on each of the graves and he could hear her talking softly. 

There was an odd feeling blooming in his chest, knowing that he wasn’t the only one that spoke to the dead. He made his way across the cemetery, to the two graves that waited for his visit four times a week. 

“Hey guys,” He murmured, standing with his hand in his pocket. His stomach churned as he mulled over his words. He hadn’t told them yet… hadn’t told them that he had finally gotten him, finally took down the man that had ruined all of their lives. 

Kakashi took in a shuddering breath. “We got him,” he breathed. “I… Genma and I linked him to some murders and we got him. He’s in custody and he’s going away.”

He didn’t realize he was shaking until he clenched his fist, flexing his hand before trying to force the tension from his body. “We— we took down his entire empire finally. It's gone now, just crumbs left that others are going to take care of.” Licking his chapped lips he continued, “Genma got shot and had to get surgery but he’s okay. Kicking up a fuss at the hospital and driving the nurses mad,” 

Obito was laughing in his head, _What, you gonna let Genma get all the glory?_

Kakashi shook his head in slight amusement, pulling his mask back up before closing his eyes. “You guys can rest peacefully now.” He whispered, shivering and not from the wind. 

_We have been, Kakashi._ Rin’s soft voice caressed his mind. _It's your turn now. Be happy, for us. For you._

He paused at that, his hands relaxing as he stared at the headstones before he heard soft footsteps pause behind him, He turned around slowly to find Sakura standing several feet away, holding flowers in her hands. 

She offered a nod, tracking who he was standing in front of before speaking softly, “Sorry to interrupt, but… well, would they like flowers?” 

Kakashi stared at her, eyes widening just a fraction before he moistened his lips and swallowed. 

_Cat got your tongue?_ Obito teased.

Kakashi nodded mutely and Sakura stepped forward a bit shyly and offered the flowers to him. “If you want… I packed way too much food,” She trailed off, looking sheepish but not blushing or embarrassed. She looked too tired for such emotions. 

Kakashi set the flowers on both of his best friends' graves before looking back at Sakura, “Do you have any eggplant?”

_Smooth Kakashi, real smooth._ Rin sighed wearily, he could hear her shaking her head.

The question seemed to catch her off guard because her brows flicked up and she shook her head. “No,” She murmured slowly. “I have sandwiches, fruit, and lemonade. Will that do?”

Kakashi’s eyes crinkled and he strode over to her, “Yes, Sakura. You’re very kind.”

She shrugged as she looked at him again, the same way she had at the hospital. It was like she was seeing beyond him and into his soul and yet… also not looking at anything. As if she was there but also not. 

Sakura waved off the compliment turning to walk back to her spot, “Not really, I’m told I can be quite mean and violent if provoked,”

His lips quirked up without his consent as he settled next to her, taking the offered food and looking at the graves. 

_Mebuki Haruno_. Loving father and deeply cherished. 

_Kizashi Haruno_. Doting mother and dearly missed. 

_Akiro Haruno_. Caring brother and passionately loved. 

Her loss hit him like a blow, sending his head spinning and he forced himself to tear his eyes from the headstones and to look at her. Her face was carefully blank, but her eyes were an ocean of emotion. A raging sea of green, churning with misery, with sadness, defeat. Sakura simply inclined her head and he understood. 

A woman surrounded by loss. A surgeon who could not save everyone. A person who often held hands with death. 

“We should get coffee sometime,” He offered while she politely looked away so he could eat. 

“Why?”

“You’re interesting Dr. Haruno. And not many things are interesting in this dull world,”

“Some argue this world is overflowing with life and color,” She stated, studying the sky. She said it like it was a cruel joke, like a laugh without humor. 

“Do you believe that?” He asked, pulling his mask back up.

She looked at him, green eyes dull and reflective, like a mirror. “I used to.”

. . .

They met for coffee a week later at a small cafe near the graveyard. 

(He was thirty minutes late, which by his standards was perfectly on time.)

“You’re a surgeon.” 

“Very good, Detective, now I see why they gave you the badge.” There was mirth in her eyes and her brows were raised as she sipped her iced coffee. 

(She didn’t like hot coffee, she told him. Hated when her mouth got burned. 

“What if it's cold out?” He asked incredulously, amusement seeping into his words.

“Then I will simply freeze.”

He had bit back a laugh at that and her lips had twitched a bit.)

Kakashi huffed and shook his head in amusement before resting his ankle over his knee, “How?”

“Well, first I graduate high school, then pre—”

“Okay smartass,” Kakashi smirked, and there was a spark in Sakura’s eyes, a hint of entertainment on her face. “You’re like what? Twenty-four? You’re young, how the hell are you a top surgeon already?”

Sakura licked her lips, “I’m twenty six, I graduated high school early, went straight into college at the ripe age of seventeen. Tsuande picked me up and here we are.” There was a coy look in her eye, “Though, I think saying I’m one of the ‘top surgeons’ is a bit of a stretch.”

“Tsunade seems to think you’re one of the elite,” He parried casually, taking note of her tattooed fingers. Her slender hands were an assortment of small yet colorful tattoos that were nothing but lines of varying degrees. Swiggles, circles, straight, parallel. Simplistic and bold. 

“She says that because she trained me.” Sakura waved off the compliment before noting his staring, “My friend is a tattoo artist, so I get them for free.”

Kakashi nodded sagely, eyes crinkling, “She always has been prideful,”

If she was surprised by the new information, she didn’t show it, though she looked slightly amused by his statement. 

Kakashi cocked his head to the side, “Does this seem… odd to you? That we’re just strangers who met during a storm, then you saved one of my best friends, and now we’re just drinking coffee?”

Sakura studied him, green eyes sharp yet distance. She seemed to find what she was looking for because she shifted her focus out the window before answering, “Not really. Like calls to like, right?” Then her voice lifted teasingly, “Besides, most people would call this a date.” 

Snorting at the second part, he studied her profile. Pink hair hung limply down her back, a black turtleneck was form fitting and so were her dark jeans. Her nose was slightly crooked, dark bags under her eyes were stark against her pale skin and her full lips were chapped.

_Beautiful_ , he thought, stiffening. 

He knew exactly what she meant, but he asked anyway, “And what does that mean?”

She made eye contact and did not flinch away at the intensity of his stare nor the scar that marred the left of his face. She looked at him as if she was looking into a mirror, something familiar, something like herself. “Your eyes.” She said simply. “They’re like mine and people like us… we should stick together.”

The words struck him.

_She knows._ Rin and Obito murmured. 

He nodded silently (whether to his friends or to the woman in front of him, he wasn’t sure), setting his cup onto the table. “Do you read?”

She blinked in surprise at the question, a furrow in her brow. “Is this an interrogation?”

Kakashi’s eyes crinkled, “Think of it as Edward and Bella’s series of questions,”

Her eyes widened as she leaned over the table, something akin to excitement and a bit of surprise dancing in her eyes, “You’ve read Twilight.”

“Mah, for all you know I could have just watched the movies,”

She leaned back, looking slightly smug. “Those scenes aren’t in the movie, Detective Hatake.” Her eyes danced with amusement though her face seemed impassive, almost expressionless. 

“You caught me,” He held up his hands. “I read the cliches, what can I say? Though, I do find myself enjoying Fifty Shades of Grey a bit more,” 

“Ah,” Sakura murmured sagely, her lips twitching. “So you _are_ a pervert.”

Kakashi blinked at her before he was chuckling, “I just like reading explicit literature, can you fault me for that, Doctor?”

Sakura regarded him lightly before shaking her head, her eyes crinkling just a tad, “I guess I can’t considering it would make me a hypocrite.” She paused before adding, as if wading into new territory. Her eyes became distant once more, the green darkening and her lips pursed slightly. “Maybe we should start a bookclub.” 

Kakashi held back the laugh that threatened to spill over, grinning despite himself. 

He wrote his number on the napkin and told her to text him whenever. 

(They both left feeling lighter than they had in a very long time.)

. . .

Wednesday 3:23 pm

_Sakura:_

_-Hey, it's Sakura._

_if you had to choose between only drinking-_

_milkshakes your entire life or never being_

_able to dance again what would you choose?_

_-…?_

_its a very serious question doctor!-_

_-Dancing. I don’t usually dance_

_So it wouldn’t make much of a difference_

_-Plus, I love ice cream._

_duly noted….-_

_-Strange._

_-That’s the word I’ll be calling you from now on._

_not incredibly clever or deviously handsome?-_

_for shame.-_

_-Have a good day Kakashi._

  
  


. . .

_Tuesday 12:54 am_

_Sakura:_

_-Do you ever feel alone?_

_all the time.-_

_why-_

_-Because I'm tired of it_

_-I'm tired of a lot of things_

_-Most things really._

_-Are you?_

_coffee?-_

_-At the hospital…_

_-Call in five?_

_im looking forward to it doctor. ;)-_

. . .

  
  


They met again a month later at a dojo. 

They had been texting back and forth, both busy with work. Her with the hospital and him with the upcoming trial. Most of their time speaking was at witching hour, which had not been great for either of their sleeping schedules.

His friend owned the place and they were meeting there before heading out to get drinks. But there she was, in the middle of the mat, clad in a sports bra and running shorts, her hands wrapped, landing hit after hit on another man that looked eerily like Gai. 

But what really had him freezing were her tattoos. 

Her body was a work of art. Defined muscle with a hint of soft curves. Her skin was covered in solid lines both intricate and messy. The tattoos were individual and left very little of her skin unmarked. Going from her chest, disappearing under her shorts and down her legs, her arms displaying the ink proudly.

(There were cartoonish ones popping with color, dark ones like skulls and snakes, a beautifully tattooed dragon snaked its way onto her thigh and disappeared into her shorts. 

_Beautiful._ He thought again, and he could have sworn he heard Obito’s snickering in the back of his head.)

But her back was a more somber sight. Names were tattooed there, in solid and bold print. A reminder, he realized. For what, he didn't know. 

There was a gleam to her eye, a slight spark… the same one he had seen at the hospital, and then it was gone. 

( _Curious_ , he thought. _Resurrection_.)

A group of boisterous boys were hollering Sakura's name as she landed the final blow, sending her opponent sprawling onto the mat. The girls whistled loudly as the doctor helped her opponent to his feet, the man pulling her into a joyfully tearful hug. 

He wondered what it was like to be surrounded by such life and yet still not feel complete. He would have to ask her during their next round of Edward and Bella.

(She had insisted they call it that after he had made the reference. He hadn’t put up much of a fight anyways. He had a feeling that if Haruno Sakura wanted something, she got it.

Though, she did make it abundantly clear that she was _not_ in fact a boring fictional character whose life revolves around a vampire who literally wanted to kill her.)

(She was surprisingly funny.)

Genma propped his elbow on Kakashi's good shoulder, "She is an absolute _vixen_. Do you see her thighs? Those arms? That as—" 

“Genma.” Kakashi rolled his eyes at his partner, shooting him an unamsued look before he heard his name being called. 

Tenzo just raised his brows at the both of them, “You know her?”

Genma grinned boyishly, “Know her? Hell, I owe her my fuckin’ life. I definitely wouldn’t mind getting to-”

Kakashi slapped a hand on his friend’s mouth, giving him an unimpressed look. Genma licked his hand and Tenzo just grimaced. 

Sakura moved through the crowd, flushed and dripping with sweat. "Kakashi," She greeted, and then gave Genma a once over, "Genma. Kakashi and Genma’s friend?"

“Tenzo,” Tenzo introduced himself, going to shake her hand, a slight smile on his face. Sakura nodded back before looking at Kakashi.

"I didn't know you knew Gai," Kakshi slouched, hands in his pockets. Luckly, he had upgraded to just a cast instead of a sling. 

As if summoned, Gai popped out of nowhere, slinging an arm around Sakura's shoulders, "Ah! Our beautiful Blossom here is the epitome of youthfulness! I've been teaching her since she was a young sapling!" 

Sakura blushed an even deeper red, glancing at her feet before looking at his cast wryly. "I would invite you to the mat, Detective. But you're still in your cast." 

"And me, Petal?" 

Sakura's lips twitched but she frowned at Genma, "You forget that I literally put you back together. You shouldn't even be walking around, your body needs rest." 

She never smiled, he noted. Just looked amused enough to pass. 

(When her lips twitch, he thinks, it's like she is trying to remember how to smile, but she just can't.) 

Genma sighed dramatically but gave Sakura a wide smile, “You wanna come out to the bar with us, Petal? Bet I could drink you under the table,”

The conversion picked up once a few of Sakura’s friends came over, someone new taking the mat. Kakashi tuned it out, eyeing Sakura’s tattoos, the definition of her muscle, the way her shoulders always seemed so tense, as if ready for a fight at any time. 

Survivor instincts, he decided because he felt the same. Always taunt and tight, always on the defense, always evading. 

“Kakashi?” Sakura’s voice caught his attention and he slowly slid his eyes to her’s, quirking a brow. “You okay? Your arm isn’t bothering you, is it? I have pain medication in my locker—” 

“No, no Sakura, but thank you.” He gave her an eye crinkle but she didn’t relax, only stared at him harder. “Will you be joining us at the bar?”

“Bar?” A blonde woman called, bouncing over to them with bright blue eyes, her hair swinging behind her. “Of course she’ll be there!” She gave the three men a sly smile, “Hope you don’t mind the group coming with, we were gonna head there after all this anyways,” 

Kakashi scratched the back of his head, looking over to Genma who was practically drooling at the blonde and Gai who was wiping away prideful tears. Sighing, he shrugged, “I don’t care. See you there Sakura,” 

The group eventually made it to the bar. The blonde, Ino, pushed Sakura ahead of them while Sakura just looked… bored if not a bit antsy. 

“So, you and Sakura know each other?” Gai asked, waving at his students. 

“She saved Genma’s sorry ass after our arrest,” Kakashi said boredly, swirling his water around, tracking as Sakura broke off from her pack. One of the boys grabbed her arm, a tall one with dark hair and feral eyes. He murmured something in her ear, grip tightening on her arm but she simply nodded, kissing his cheek and patting his chest before pulling away.

“She’s close with her friends,” He noted outloud and Gai nodded.

“The past few years have not treated our Blossom kindly.” His friend was oddly somber, “That group is what kept her grounded. And now she has faced an even greater tragedy… they’re all very protective of one another.” 

Kakashi nodded silently, he understood that. They were a family, a pack. They relied on each other and needed each other. He found himself a bit jealous, a bit envious that Sakura still had those people. 

Sakura sat next to him, nodding her greeting before ordering a water. 

“Not drinking?”

She shook her head, pursing her lips. “I don’t drink… I just don’t enjoy it anymore.”

She was a good liar, he’d give her that. “You didn’t say you had more tattoos,”

Sakura huffed, eyes sliding to his, “Why does it matter?”

“It doesn’t,” Kakashi shrugged. “But tell me about the ones on your back,” 

Sakura stiffened, moistening her lips as her eyes bored into his. Her eyes were green, a dull and dead green, but on the mat, after that surgery they had sparked, they had been lighter and alive. He wanted to see that light again. “If I do, what do I get?”

“What do you want?” He studied her fingers, trailing up her arms.

“What do you have to offer?”

Kakashi felt the tug of a smile behind his mask, “I’ll tell you whatever you would like to know,”

“Why do you wear a mask?” A blunt and straight to the point question that had him blinking and then tearing his eyes away from her’s. He felt hot and sweaty all of a sudden as he took in a breath. 

She understood the games and the dancing around answers too well for him to do it, so he answered just as bluntly, “I look too much like my father who killed himself. I have a scar running down my face that makes people stare. Its protection, it's a barrier from everyone and me. A wall, I guess you could call it.” 

She had her chin in her hand as she listened and her eyes were no longer dead. They were green, a lovely shade and she nodded, her face softening. “The names on my back are the patients that I couldn’t save. They’re my family and my closest friends. Some people think I just like torturing myself because I have my failures inked on me forever. And maybe they’re right,” She didn’t smile but there was a type of cruel amusement in her eye as she studied the bar. “They remind me of who I am and what I’m doing and why I’m doing it. I guess it's my way of honoring them, carrying their names with me everywhere.”

“Do you ever regret having a name added?”

She paused, hand tightening around her glass and she nodded slowly, looking up at him. “One.” She drew idle circles on the counter, “Has anyone ever seen you without the mask since you started wearing it?”

“My dogs,” He says without thinking. Kakashi balked, he never spoke about his private life, usually it was like pulling teeth. 

But then her eyes lit up and her back straightened. “How many dogs?”

He answered without hesitation, “Eight.”

He watched as the corners of her lips tugged up ever so slightly before she was grabbing his attention again, “When can I meet them?”

“Whenever you’d like, Sakura.” He cursed himself over and over. When was the last time anyone besides Genma, Tenzo, and Gai been to his house? And even then they’d rarely come inside let alone meet his _dogs_. 

And now he was letting a woman who he had known for not even two months into places that no one had been in since Rin and Obito's deaths. 

_Not just any woman,_ He reminded himself, _She’s someone like you._

The look she gave him, the way her eyes shone with light and her lips were tugging up just a little more made him lean forward every so slightly. But then she frowned, pursing her lips, “Are you sure?”

He swore she could read his mind. But he found himself shrugging, “People like us, we need to stick together, right?”

She nodded at the repetition of her own words, looking pleased before surveying the crowd. A frown pulled at her mouth and he could only agree with the gesture. Why he let himself be pulled out on nights like this, he would never know. “Let me know when you aren’t busy and I’ll stop by.” She frowned at the crowd again before standing, “You wanna get out of here? I’m starving,”

“Are you sure you can’t read my mind?” He asked in mock seriousness as he stood up, Sakura throwing down enough money for the both of them.

She gave him an amused look, “You know I can’t tell you all my secrets, right?”

. . .

She took him to a small pizza diner that was near the bar.

“This was my brother’s favorite place,” She said as an explanation before pushing in the door and holding it open for Kakashi to step in. 

"It's cute," He commented as she went ahead and slid into the booth her and Akira would use.

"He found it after practice one time, took all his dates here,” A warm feeling spread through her chest at the memory. “The owners ended up just giving him a discount because he was here so much.” 

Kakashi’s eyes crinkled before he said gently, “Tell me about Akiro.”

She hesitated, searching what she could see of his face before pursing her lips. They never asked about their people, it was a mutual thing. But she found herself speaking about her family for the first time since their deaths.

“He was twenty-one, going to school to be an animator. He loved disney movies, his favorite was The Little Mermaid,” She traced shapes onto the table, eyes downcast. “He came out as gay when he was sixteen and he was shaking so much and almost to tears that I was more in shock of that than anything.” She looked towards the counter wistfully. “Kiro was always a spitfire, he gave no shits, took none either. 

“He was tall and brave and my best friend. We fought almost every day, at each other’s throats about the smallest things. We got into a brawl one time because we couldn’t find the remote and it was just sitting on the counter.” She laughed hoarsely at the memory, just a push of air that felt so odd and new. Her voice came out strangled, “I miss him so much.” 

She didn’t realize she was crying until a hand was cupping her face and a thumb brushing at her wet cheek. She looked up, startled at the touch. Most days the only people that touched her were her patients or close friends. But none of those touches were as gentle at this, as warm and safe. 

“Thank you,” He murmured, swiping at her cheek once more before pulling away. A new feeling settled over them, but it didn’t feel _new_. Just… rare. Peaceful. 

Speaking to Kakashi was like remembering. It was like remembering how to breath, how to smile, how to be alive. As if she was remembering what it felt like to enjoy food again, to breath in the air. She was remembering that her favorite coffee was iced, that when she has pizza she picks off the cheese and eats that first. 

It was remembering his favorite food was miso soup with eggplant. Remembering he was a well known detective that had solved thousands of cases, that had taken down the very Underworld of criminals. His favorite color was green and his favorite book series was Icha Icha. Though, he has almost every Jane Austen book and often rereads Dracula just because. 

They had a click, something that fell right into place for them. It felt like she was slowly making her way home with him by her side as they spent more time together, more time talking. He eased her mind because he _understood_. He understood her heartache and headaches, understood why she pushed everyone away when things got too much. 

She had never felt this way before. It was exhilarating and terrifying all at the same time. 

They seemed to come to the same conclusion when the waiter came by with two waters and a large cheese pizza. He smiled at them, “On the house, Sakura. We missed you here,” And then was gone. 

“Do you want to know about Obito or Rin?” He asked after a moment, watching in mild disgust and interest at the way Sakura dissected her food. She felt her lips tug up just a bit at that.

She shook her head, “Tell me another time,” She looked away as he went to take a bite of his food, “Are we going to start that book club, Detective?”

“You aren’t gonna give that up, are you?”

Sakura huffed, giving him the side eye as she sipped her water, “Probably not. What’s your favorite movie?”

“Either Back to the Future or Pride and Prejudice with Keira Knightly.”

“Why?”

“Well, Back to the Future is a classic, though the second one is shit, the third one is pretty okay.” He tapped his chin in mock thought and Sakura sat forward with interest, a brow ticking up. “Now, Kiera Knightly’s Pride and Prejudice is just art,”

Sakura’s lips twitched and he seemed to track the movement. “That’s one of my favorites too,” She confesses, “Have you watched The Old Guard? It's on Netflix,” Kakashi shook his head, cocking it to the side in question. Sakura found herself almost smiling, a ghost of one of her lips. 

(It startled her, like a jolt to the brain that with him it was so easy to smile, so easy to be okay with her grief and still find a little happiness.)

“We’re going to have a movie day.” She decided and he laughed, the sound low and it scraped against her bones, going straight to her heart. 

(Her heart sped up, dancing to the sound like a lost tune.)

_Beautiful,_ she thought, stiffening.

“Anything you want Dr. Haruno, you get,” He teased and she gave him an unimpressed look that had him laughing again. 

Kakashi looked a bit startled at the sound, blinking several times as if seeing her clearly, studying her the way she did to him. He relaxed then, the wariness easing away as he leaned back into the booth, running a hand through his hair. 

“Do you need a ride home?” She asked, going ahead and texting Ino that she left and would be getting home safely. 

He eyed her with mirth, “Reading minds and foretelling the future, is there anything you can’t do?”

“Sing,” She answered immediately and then paled. Her hands fluttered and she scratched the back of her neck sheepishly, but Kakashi’s eyes were bright with interest.

And she noticed, for the first time (but not the last) that his eyes weren’t black. Not always, they were a dark gray, gleaming and… and lovely. They were lovely. 

_Someone has a crush…_ Akiro sang and Sakura did her best to not scowl. 

“I can’t sing,” She said after a moment, searching his eyes as he smirked from under his mask. 

“Will you show me while you drive me home, Doctor?”

She stared at him incredulously. “You want to hear my terrible singing?” She asked slowly, brows inching together.

_Dear god, the man has a death wish._ Her father laughed. She could hear her mother smacking his arm with a chuckle. 

Kakashi stood, offering his hand as he nodded, “Very good Doctor, I’ll have to talk to Tsunade about getting you a raise.”

She snorted, taking his hand and waving to the waiter as they made their way out.

(Neither of them let go of each other. 

_A life line_ , they thought, glancing at their joined hands every now and then, hidden smiles on their faces.) 

They climbed into her car and she started it, messing with the controls before connecting her bluetooth, sending him a look, “And you’re sure you want to hear my singing? I’m warning, you everyone’s told me I could make a bat go deaf,”

Kakashi laughed and Sakura wanted to hear him do that for the rest of her life. “I’m sure they’re exaggerating. Put your favorite song on, maybe I’ll know it too.”

Sakura loved to sing, the point was that she was literal shit at it. But, she did as she was told, hitting play. 

(It was just so easy with him. So fucking _easy_ to feel normal, to do things like sing, and eat pizza, and talk about her brother.)

“Dance With U by Staring in Spaces,” She answered his unasked question as she reversed out of her parking spot and the music began. 

She rolled down the windows as the instruments began to play and then she was singing, head nodding and body moving in her seat. 

_It's just a crush I swear_

_It's nothing more or less_

_It's just the fact you're there_

_It makes me so obsessed_

_I wish you knew what I was thinking_

_Having dreams of finally meeting_

She turned the volume up at the next verse, voice being carried away by the wind as she sang and found herself _enjoying_ the music, enjoying the feel of the cold air biting her skin. And to her surprise (and glee) Kakashi began to sing along too as the chorus came up.

_I would walk across the world_

_Just to end up on your_

_Doorstep, take my hand_

_We don't need to have a_

_Plan, let's run away_

_Until we fall out of love_

(She didn’t see it because it was too dark but he was trembling slightly, his face flushed as he looked at her, staring in almost awe, not caring about how off tune she was, how she missed and stumbled on a few lyrics. He stared at her and felt himself coming alive.)

The song ended slowly and the next came up before she was lowering down the volume, face flushed and her eyes were bright. “Can you still hear me?” She joked.

“Mah, Sakura. I’m not that old yet and I quite like your singing,” He answered and Sakura’s mouth turned up slightly. 

“You know, as much as I want to keep driving around and yelling songs with you, I kind of need your address,”

He rattled off a street name and she typed it into her GPS before turning the volume back up again. 

She made sure to take the longer route as they both sang, something eclectic in the air. 

And when they said goodbye, she felt light, almost giddy. She bit back a smile, a shiver running up her spine. 

_Happiness,_ Her family’s voices blended together to answer her unasked question. _Do you remember it, Blossom?_

_Maybe_ , she thought as she watched Kakashi open his door and wave to her. _Maybe I'm beginning to_. 

. . .

_Saturday 10:36 pm_

_Kakashi:_

_-im off on Friday next, next week. You free?_

_-also, missed you at the hospital.._

_finally free of that damned cast_

_LOL if you told me you were coming then-_

_I would have been there!_

_I should be-_

_Yeah, nothing scheduled that day so I can take off_

_-cool._

_-see you then_

_Looking forward to it. <3- _

_Should I bring anything?-_

_-not sure… you up to give my_

_dogs a bath and do your movie day?_

_Yes!!!-_

_Sounds perfect.-_

_-sweet :)_

. . .

She came over two weeks later and he was rushing to clean the house. 

The dogs knew something was up, nipping at his heels and barking out the windows even though no one was there. It was like rubbing salt into the wound knowing that the moment he started _cleaning_ they knew someone was coming over.

She called him when she pulled up, not wanting to excite the dogs even more by knocking or ringing the doorbell. 

“Listen you guys,” He said sternly, all eight of his dogs sitting in a line, tongues lolling out and eyes glazed in excitement. “You have to be nice to her, she’s coming to give you a bath. So, _no_ jumping.”

Of course, as soon as he opened the door, the dogs pounced. 

Sakura met them in kind, eyes round as she was overcome with dog fur and slobber. “Hello!” She greeted, kneeling down so they could get better access to her, licking every inch of her face, smelling her hands and legs. 

Pakkun waddled over, the other dogs clearing a space for him as he came forward and delicately sniffed at Sakura’s offered hand then yipped, turning to look at Kakashi smugly. Kakashi rolled his eyes, “You done boys?”

Sakura slowly got up, her face flushed and her eyes were absolutely shining. “Hey,” She said a bit breathlessly and Kakashi found himself smiling. She was dressed in a sleeveless shirt cut down the sides so he could see her tattooed ribs and sports bra, along with some tight fitting yoga shorts. 

(Genma was right. Her thighs were pretty amazing.

Somewhere in his head Obito snorted and Rin giggled.)

He pointedly looked at her face, ignoring how his ears burned, “Hey yourself,”

She shouldered the bag she was carrying and shut the door behind her walking in like she owned the place.

(If you asked Kakashi, he would have said she fit in seamlessly, as if she was always supposed to be there.)

“I have my Netflix password and I brought lots of electrolytes,” Sakura called, the dogs trailing after her like love sick puppies. 

“I have all the dog bath stuff set up outside,” He said, going to scratch behind Bull’s ears as the big guy drooled onto the hardwood floors, padding after Sakura as she wandered her way outside.

“You didn’t say you were rich, Detective,” She teased, glancing at him from over her shoulder as she surveyed the expansive backyard. 

“Cause I’m not Doctor,” He called as he closed the sliding glass door, going to turn on the hose. “This was my dad’s house, I inherited when I turned eighteen and lived here ever since.”

There was a beat of silence before Sakura’s voice filled the air, “It’s beautiful.” She was looking at him, not in pity like he was so used to, but in acceptance. She knelt down next to Guroko, the smaller dog’s tail going wild as she rubbed behind his ears and placed kisses on his head. “How’d you end up with eight of these cuties?”

He snorted as he came back around, hose bent in his hand as he whistled, the dogs coming to gather in one spot. “Rescues, except for Pakkun. He was a gift from Obito and Rin,” He tugged his shirt over his head, trying hard not to flush under the sudden attention Sakura was giving him. “You ready to give these assholes a bath?”

There was something so domestic about the way Sakura just fit so well into his home. His dogs loved her and they barely tolerated Gai and Genma who he had known for years. They tolerated Tenzo enough the few times they had seen him. Sakura had brought her bluetooth speaker, hooking up a good playlist as they set to work, each doing their own set of dogs. 

He was just finishing up with Shiba as he looked up, eyes widening as Bull jumped on Sakura with a joyful bark, knocking them both over. Heavy silence blanketed the yard before Sakura was sitting up, mud on her face, soap in her hair, Bull’s massive body settled onto hers and she was laughing, throwing back her head and shaking.

_It was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard._

Bull lapped at her face and she pushed him off gently, still laughing as she pulled her muddied shirt over her head and then looked at him, eyes lit and full and, 

and

he

forgot

how 

to 

_breath_.

His throat went dry as he stumbled over to offer her a hand. “I warned them not to jump,” Kakashi managed to say, hauling Sakura to her feet as she beamed up at him.

(His heart stumbled and leapt. His lungs stuttered and paused at the sight. His stomach clenched as butterflies erupted.

_Whipped,_ Obito sang in his head.

_Aw! Kakashi!_ Rin gushed.

_Fuck off._ Kakashi thought eloquently.)

“Oh I don’t mind,” Sakura assured him, looking at the other dogs who were sunbathing on the concrete, all freshly washed and drying. “I _love_ dogs, they’re the best. And yours are fucking adorable,” 

He just nodded, watching as she bounced over to the pack, laying right down beside them, the dogs instantly gravitating towards her. “I think they like you more than me,” He grumbled, coming to sit next to her, Pakkun nudging his knee.

Sakura laughed again, looking up at the sky, “Not surprising. I’m told I can be quite charming,”

“I thought you said you were violent.”

“Only when provoked, Detective.” She chirped, rolling over to face him.

And it dawns on him that he had never seen her so lively before. She had always been coy and teasing but absent, her eyes rarely having this type of excitement. But here she was, Haruno Sakura, laughing and playing with his dogs, and looking at him, and being alive.

His heart pounded without his consent as Sakura smiled at him. He caught himself staring and flushed from behind his mask before he sat up abruptly, the dogs perking up. “Well they’re clean and we’re filthy,”

Sakura sat up slowly, head tilted up to scan the sky while her long braid swung slightly from the breeze, “You still wanna have that movie day? I was planning on ordering some take out or something,”

“Of course, you want to shower first? I might have some clothes small enough to fit you,”

Sakura gave him the side eye. “I am not _small_.” He could have sworn she was pouting. 

Kakashi laughed, pushing Sakura’s arm gently, “Of course not, you could kick my ass,”

Sakura grinned at him, lips spreading into a wide smile and his eyes widened just a fraction. 

_Ethereal,_ his mind supplied. _Beautiful._

“That’s right,” Sakura quipped, standing up and stretching her hands above her head lazily. 

(And if Kakashi let himself drink in the sight of her defined muscles, the way the ink of her skin stretched, and how her abs looked absolutely delicious, then sue him.)

“Let’s get this cleaned up and then I’ll order the food,” She said, crouching down to place a kiss on each one of the sleeping dogs’ heads, Pakkun looking at him even more smug. Kakashi glared before getting up, collecting the drenched towels while Sakura took care of the hose, throwing him the two empty bottles of dog shampoo. 

The sun was beating down on them by the time they stumbled inside, sweaty and flushed. The dogs trailed behind them happily, jumping into their usual place on the couch. Sakura made the call while logging into her Netflix account on Kakashi’s TV. 

He padded into the kitchen, grabbing two water bottles and tossing one to Sakura who caught it easily, hanging up the phone. He liked her in his home. Liked the fact that she just fit in, that his dogs loved her, that she walked around as if she owned the place. As if she felt like this was her home just as much as it was his. She brought life back here with her pink hair and green eyes. 

And the thought scared the _shit_ out of him. 

“Bathroom's upstairs to the left, I’ll leave some clothes out for you,” He says, nodding towards the stairs. Sakura flashed him a small smile before heading up the stairs, the dogs looking at him expectantly.

“You’re lucky she thinks you guys are cute,” He muttered, digging into the dog treat bag and throwing a bone to each of them. “And you’re lucky she likes you guys so much.”

They both had showered by the time his doorbell rang and the dogs were tripping over each other to bark and holler at the delivery man. 

“ _Sit_.” Kakashi ordered and the dogs sat immediately as he stepped over them to slip outside and pay the man before Sakura came down. He returned with an armful of steaming food as Sakura came into view.

He almost dropped the entire bag. 

Today, he thought a bit sourly, was full of revelations. 

Sakura looked _good_ in his black basketball shorts and too big long-sleeve shirt. Too good. Distractingly good. 

Fuck.

She looked at him, then the food, and then she was frowning. “I was going to pay for that,” She made a face at him and he just shrugged.

“Next time then. C’mon I’m fuckin’ hungry.” 

Kakashi took the couch while Sakura sat on the floor, glancing up at him as she hit play. The dogs were fanned out between them, Bull’s head in Sakura’s lap while Pakkun was sniffing her hair. 

Kakashi liked this a lot. Almost too much. And he watched Sakura stroke Bull under his chin and felt a fond feeling growing in his chest. He’d deal with it later, he decides, taking a bite of his food. 

. . .

_Thursday 4:36 am_

_Kakashi:_

_-tell me something about yourself thats_

_totally odd_

_I never liked the words girlfriend or-_

_boyfriend, they just don't resonate with me_

_I’d rather say that I’m just with someone or they’re-_

_my partner… or lover sounds like a fantasy book lol_

_-you are so odd._

_-i could eat eggplant raw all the time_

_if i’m being honest_

_You are truly disgusting.-_

_How old are you?-_

_-now now sakura, it isn’t polite to ask a_

_someone their age_

_-but i’m friends with gai so i’ll let you do the math_

_-and no. the hair is natural, i’ll show you pictures some time._

_You really do not act your age, Kakashi.-_

_-is that a compliment?_

_I’m still deciding… ;)-_

. . .

She was busy. 

The hospital was always busy but today was bone tiring and she was being pulled every direction. Sakura heaved a sigh, falling into a chair as she ran her hands through her hair. She should cut it… maybe she should ask Kakashi of what he thought about it, then Ino. 

The thought made her freeze, blink, then frown. Since when did she care what _Kakashi_ thought of her hair? Shaking her head she pushed the thought aside as her pager went off, calling her to the Nurse’s Station. 

Hauling herself up, Sakura sped towards the station, hoping that if she looked in a rush no one else would call her for help. Her shoulders slouched and her legs burned, Sakura had been putting off working out with Lee for a week and she was starting to get antsy. 

“Hey, what’s up?” She called turning the corner before slowing, eyes widening. 

Kakashi stood there, two bags in his hand, talking to the blushing nurses at the station. He said something that made them giggle before glancing to the side, noticing her. His face lit up and his eyes crinkled as he held up the bags, “Lunch?”

(Her heart jumped at his expression, the way he zeroed in on her, and her only. Maybe she needed to get her blood pressure checked.

_Oooh, someone’s got a crush._ Akira snarked.

_He is very handsome, isn’t he?_ Her mother tittered.

_Well go on! Go have lunch!_ Her father encouraged.

_You guys are the worst._ She thought sourly.)

Sakura blinked before nodding slowly, making her way towards him before glancing at the nurses who flashed her a thumbs up. She looked back to Kakashi who was still looking at her, offering his arm. “Tell Tsunade I’m taking my break,”

He led her to the cafeteria, “A little birdie told me that a certain doctor works too hard and goes without eating most of the time.”

Sakura scowled up at him, “I don’t need to be taken care of you know.”

“Oh I know that, I just missed your sweet voice and decided to come see you,” He looked down at her teasingly and Sakura felt her face flush.

“Yeah yeah, whatever you say Detective,” She huffered, pulling out a chair and looking at him expectantly. She softened a bit as leaned her chin into her palm, “But thanks for bringing me lunch, today has been so _busy_.”

Kakashi chuckled, setting the bags down and distributing the food between them, “This food, dear Sakura, comes with a price.”

“My company isn’t enough?” Sakura asked in mock hurt and Kakashi laughed lightly, eyeing her in amusement.

“Tell me something about yourself,” He offered her a fork and spoon before she popped open the lip of her Chinese take out, her mouth watering.

She answered without thinking about it, “I used to drink a lot. In excessive amounts within small time spans.” She picked at her food, glancing up at him. “I don’t know if it was long enough for me to be considered an alcoholic but it was bad. I haven't drank anything for a while now.”

It didn’t scare her anymore, how easily she spilled her deepest secrets to Kakashi. It came naturally, slid off the tongue like she was always going to tell him. She didn’t bother fighting it anymore and he didn’t either. It was nice. Having someone to be honest with, having someone that was like her. 

Understanding was a rare and lovely thing indeed. 

“Why?” Kakashi asked after a moment, the question soft. 

Sakura swallowed her food, “I was in a relationship for about a year and a half, I thought it was perfect at first. But he… the guy wasn’t nice. He never hit me or anything physical, in fact we barely touched each other at all. He would stare at other girls and eye them but then it was like he could hardly look at me. He just was mean and he got angry and we would fight all the time.” Her hands curled into fists as a large, warmer one rested on her. She looked up to find Kakashi’s eyes blazing and he nodded slightly. 

She licked her lips, shrugging one shoulder, “I don’t know why I didn’t leave sooner if I’m being honest, it was probably because he was familiar and that was some sort of comfort. Needless to say, he broke it off over a year ago because he wanted to travel overseas for his family’s business. He… he left me at the airport.” Her lips quirked up in a humorless smile, “It was raining then too,”

Kakashi flipped her hand over and intertwined their fingers, squeezing gently. “I’m glad that piece of shit is out of your life.” No apologies, they didn’t do those because they were worthless. It wasn’t either of their faults something happened to the other.

Sakura gave him a small smile, “Yeah me too, otherwise I probably wouldn’t have met you,” 

His brows flicked up in surprise and she suppressed another smile as she took a bite of her food. “So, is Genma getting on your nerves again?” 

Kakashi gave her a knowing look, “Is that a rhetorical question?”

She laughs forking more food into her mouth. She liked these moments, where they would just talk and laugh. 

(It was odd to laugh again, it was odd to smile. It felt for foreign but he made it okay.)

It was domestic and sweet and, and

Oh, _fuck_. 

_Whipped!_ Her brother yelled cheerfully. 

. . .

She knew just how much he was dreading the trial. He had deeper bags under his eyes, he was fidgety and he wasn’t texting as much.

It didn’t bother her. She was just worried, but she gave him space, checked in with him as they usually did, but didn’t overstep. The trial has been being broadcasted on the news and the defendant was going away for three life sentences. 

It was pouring when she pulled up to his house, miso soup with eggplant, a box of pizza, and a large mountain dew sitting in her passenger seat. He hadn’t responded to any of her texts and she knew she probably shouldn’t over step but she was _worried_. 

So, Sakura gathered all her shit and made a mad dash towards his door, knocking on it soundly as the dogs began to bark and then the lock was sliding out of place.

He looked like shit to say the least. He hadn’t changed out of his dress shirt and pants, his eyes were hazy, and his mask crumpled. “Sakura?” he asked blearily and her heart cracked.

“Hey, I brought your favorite.” She greeted, showing the food as a peace offering. 

He blinked at her before pushing the dogs away with his leg and allowing her inside. “You didn’t answer your texts so I got worried,” She said a bit hurriedly, licking her lips as her hair dripped. “And I know the trial and case has been eating at you so I—I wasn’t sure if you wanted to be alone. But if you do! I can leave—”

“No,” he murmured, shaking his head. “Could you… could you stay?”

That was all she needed to hear. She shrugged off her jacket, hanging it up with the rest of his and padding towards the dining room she had seen the first time she was there. The dogs followed after her, noses in the air and Kakashi wasn’t far behind. 

She set the food and soda onto the table, glancing at him as he sat down, still watching her a bit warily. “You don’t have to tell me anything,” She said softly, pushing his soup towards him. “We’re friends Kakashi, but you don’t owe me anything,”

His eye crinkled ever so slightly at the word “friends”, a brow quirking up. She blushed, looking away as she opened her pizza box and leaned back into the seat. They were definitely more than friends, it was a mutual feeling that they both understood. They hadn’t kissed or had sex but there was _something._ Something that made their hands brush, their shoulders bump, sharing looks and glances while holding silent conversations. 

Friends, she decided, do not look at each other the way she and Kakashi did. 

It was silent for a moment before he sighed and Sakura looked up in alarm as he pulled down his mask, and then looked at her. And

she

couldn’t

_breath_.

There was silver stubble around the sharp angle of his jaw, his cheekbones were clean cut and he had a straight nose with thin lips. The scar ran down the left side of his face but it only made him look elegant, more

“ _Beautiful_ ,” She found herself gasping and watched in amazement as there was a slight blush to his cheeks.

Then he was talking, his voice was soft, barely above a whisper. “Orochimaru’s Underworld ruined my entire life. My father had been in the FBI, part of an undercover mission where they needed to take down a part of Orochimaru’s entire network despite any cost. 

“My dad was there for years and when it finally came time to take care of business, he couldn’t. He decided to save his teammates and then they lost the trail. He was forced into retirement and then he killed himself shortly after. Some say it was out of shame, but I think it was because of the shit he saw down there. I moved in with Tsunade’s family afterwards. 

“I met my best friend Obito at the academy, we had always been together, we were rookies together, partners. We solved hundreds of cases with just us and we did almost everything together. And then Rin came around, she was a sweet woman, a transfer from the Drugs unit and we worked great together. Until this case came onto our desks.” He was trembling and Sakura slowly reached out for his hand and he took it greedily, studying the way their fingers intertwined before continuing. 

“Graves were being dug up and bodies were being stolen from mourges. No one knew what exactly was going on but I had a feeling, a tingling down my neck that _he_ was behind it all. The three of us went behind our supervisor’s back and then we got in too deep and,” Kakashi’s voice broke, his knuckles going white from how hard he was squeezing her hand, as if it was the only thing holding him here. 

“Rin and Obito were killed in a hit.” He whispered the words, swallowing heavily. “The family that had basically taken me and Tsunade in, Minato and Kushina, were next. They were both in the FBI dealing with the Underworld too. They had just had a _baby_ and they were out and then they were mugged and killed.” Kakashi tore his hand away from hers, burying his face in them as his shoulders shook. 

“I couldn’t even go to their funerals.” He cleared his throat, hands falling limply into his lap. He looked pale and defeated, just how he had the first time she had seen him. 

_A ghost._ She had thought, _like me._

“And then, we got him. Genma and I got him and Genma almost fucking died because he jumped in front of me,” A hoarse, humorless laugh came from him and Sakura’s heart shattered. “And now he’s going away and… and I don't know what to do anymore.”

Sakura stood slowly and Kakashi looked up at her, eyes red and his shoulders slumped as if expecting her to leave. Instead, she made her way around the table and pulled him into a hug, his face in her neck and arms around each other. 

“Everyone around me dies,” He rasped and Sakura’s stomach clenched.

She ran her fingers through his hair, fingers tracing his spin, “You save lives, Kakashi,” She corrects softly. “You catch killers and you took down that bastard's entire empire and you save lives.”

“You could be next,” He parried, arms around her tightening. “If you… if you—”

“That won’t happen,” She soothed, though her heart sped up. “We won’t let that happen,” 

He pulled away from her, looking at her with vulnerable gray eyes and she leaned forward, resting her forehead against his. “You aren’t losing me and I’m not losing you.” She whispered. 

She heard him swallow and then whisper, “I don’t think we’re ghosts anymore.” 

Sakura couldn’t help but agree. 

The food was eaten and they had water instead of soda. He offered her a shower and clothes and she took them with a smile that he returned. Sakura didn’t leave his house that night, instead she ended up curled in his arms, surrounded by eight snoring dogs.

It was the best sleep she had in years. 

. . .

They have more sleep overs in the future. They don’t _sleep_ together but she has a drawer in his bedroom and picked out a favorite mug while he keeps her favorite creamer in his fridge and the door unlocked for her. He gave her a custom key the fourth time she stayed over. 

She gives him a key, when she comes by with dog treats, for her place and cleared out a space in her closet for him. She sleeps in his shirts and steals his hoodies, while he hoards her shampoo and conditioner because it smells like her. 

Neither of them say anything about labels, though they hold hands and hug and snuggle on the couch. She sleeps with her head over his heart and he has an arm wrapped around her waist and it's perfect.

(She surprised him with breakfast in bed on his birthday, though he could have sworn he never told her when it was. She also got him the newest book in his favorite series, signed by the author. But the greatest, and worst, part was when she kissed his cheek and then scurried off to work.

His face had burned the rest of the day.

_Oh you have it so bad!_ Obito cackled.)

. . .

“Alright Forehead!” Ino called as the group stormed into her apartment, Sakura stumbling out of her room half dressed with her toothbrush dangling in her mouth. “You better spill what’s been up with you,”

“What?” She mumbled, running a hand through her hair while she made her way to the kitchen sink to spit, tugging her pants on fully.

“You weren’t home yesterday morning,” Kiba states as everyone else made themselves busy making breakfast. “Now unless you’ve been pulling extra shifts at the hospital—”

“Which you shouldn’t be!” Shouted Naruto.

“Then you better tell the rest of these losers where you were,” Shika finished, coming to sling an arm around her shoulders. 

“The bags under your eyes don’t look like they could lug around groceries anymore,” Ino went on, rummaging through her fridge as Sai turned on the stove. “Your face has _color_ and you even _smiled_ the other day, Sakura.”

Shikamaru led her to her island, making her sit down and taking her toothbrush from her as Kiba settled next to her with Naruto on the other side. 

Sakura glared at them trying to dodge the questions, “Are you saying I don’t smile?” She knew exactly how they would react if she were to tell them she had been sleeping over at her more-than-a-friend-but-less-than-a-partner’s house more often than not and spent most of her free time with him too.

Sai glared at her from over his shoulder, “Don’t try it, Hag.”

Sakura crossed her arms, scowling as everyone turned to look at her. “Fine fine, you guys are a bunch of dicks,” She muttered. “Shika bring me my phone,” She called before narrowing her eyes at her family. “I made a friend,” she said breezily.

Ino was over the counter in a second, “A _friend_ that keeps you away from home?” 

Naruto was next, face going red, “Where did you meet your _friend_ ? How old are they? _Are they even safe_?”

Then Sai, “Hag, you really shouldn’t turn to sex as a way to cope. It's worse than the drinking.”

Sakura’s face went bright red as her phone was dropped into her lap and she ran her hands through her hair. “No— it—it isn’t like that!” Her voice was shrill and she smacked Naruto’s shoulder and threw her shoe at Sai's head, pushing Ino off the counter as Kiba snorted with laughter. Shikamaru just sighed heavily. 

“We met at the cemetery months ago and then I saved his partner when he was shot,” She explained quickly. “We just kept in touch and we… well we’re close.”

Ino clapped her hands, eyes round. “Oh I bet it's the hot one with silver hair! Remember Shika? From the bar?”

All eyes turned to Shikamaru as he tilted his head and then nodded lazily, “Yeah, Gai’s friend. Saw him at the dojo, Sakura left with him.”

Shika added, “He also has clothes in her closet.”

Ino squealed like the pig she was while Naruto sputtered and even Sai turned around to eye her. Kiba was the only one who whooped, shaking her shoulders as he gave her a thumbs up. 

Sakura was going to _murder_ them all. 

The eyes turned back to her and her face was burning, “I took him to the pizza place!” 

The gazes softened and everyone seemed to lean back at that information. She unlocked her phone and tapped into her gallery, showing a picture of Kakashi with his mask up sitting with his dogs. “See? This is Kakashi,” She murmured, rubbing the back of her head. “We—we aren’t having sex or anything! He… we’re very similar,” 

Naruto kissed her temple while Kiba got her cheek, Shika came over and ruffled her already tangled hair as Ino danced around and gathered her in a tight hug. Sai just dropped pancakes in front of her with a hint of a smile.

Sakura found herself laughing, pushing them off of her and smiling as they stared at her in mild amazement. “Okay okay, you know I still have a shift at the hospital, I need to get ready.”

Ino tutted, shoving a fork into her hand, “Tsuande won’t care if you’re late Forehead,” There was a wicked gleam in her eye, “Plus, you still need to tell us every juicy detail about your Kakashi.”

Sakura groaned but she did as she was told. She told them about their first meeting, and then their second, and how it had snowballed from there. How talking to him felt right, as if she was coming home. She told them how they understood each other in a way that went beyond words or flesh. 

And for once, they didn’t interrupt her. Kiba kept his arm around her shoulders and Naruto made sure she was eating. Ino was staring at her in amazement, cheeks flushing every so lightly and Shikamaru just watched her carefully, though his eyes were warm. 

Sai was the one to speak, “It sounds like you love him.”

Sakura’s face went strawberry red and her throat went dry as she stumbled and stuttered. Kiba’s arm tightened around her and she looked at him with wide eyes. He had been the one to find her after Sasuke, sitting in the rain with a large bottle of vodka next to her. He had been the one to find her everytime she was drunk and withering away.

“It's okay, Sakura,” He said gently, hand rubbing up and down her arm. “He is not Sasuke. And it's okay if you love him.”

She nodded mutely before looking at Naruto who only gave her a large smile and she felt herself relax. “But you do have to introduce him at one point you know, can’t hide him forever.”

Sakura chuckled wetly, looking at all of them and smiling, “I love you guys,”

Ino burst into tears as they all gathered her up into a crushing hug. 

Alive. She felt _Alive_. A few happy tears streamed down her cheeks as she smiled.

. . .

He should have known that as soon as Sakura had told him her friends found out, that his wouldn’t be too far behind.

Which is how he found himself being dragged from his home and into a bar, sitting across Gai, Genma, and Tenzo as they stared at him. 

“What?” He drawls lazily, ordering a water before looking at his friends, quirking a brow.

“You’re different.” Genma states, winking at the waitress that walked past their table. 

“You’re full of youthfulness!” Gai exclaimed, slamming his hands on the table. “Is it something you’re eating? A new workout?” then hesitantly, “Is it because of the trial?”

“You seem much happier,” Tenzo added, tilting his head.

Kakashi sighed, nodding to the waitress as she placed his water down and then his friends’ beers. “I’m eating the same things as always Gai and I haven’t been to the gym in a little,” He sips the water and shrugs a little, “It has to do a little with the trial but not really.”

“It’s Pinkie.” Genma decides, nudging Gai. “Remember how they left together at the bar? And I swear that he texts her and fucking _smiles_.” 

Gai and Tenzo’s eyes go wide before Gai looks at Kakashi, brows furrowing, “Sakura has been acting much happier lately. More focused and driven than before…” He eyes Kakashi and Kakashi gives him a questioning look. Then, Gai was beaming, “Lovely! You two will make beautiful babies!”

Kakashi choked, pounding at his chest as he looked up in bewilderment, “ _Babies?_ ” He shook his head rapidly while Genma howled with laughter. Tenzo just stared, eyed wide and jaw dropping.

“Oh _god_ , imagine little Kakashi’s runnin’ around,” Genma wheezed, wiping tears from his face. “I hope you’re using protection, Hatake.”

Kakashi sputtered and stared at his two best friends who were grinning at him. “We aren’t having _sex_ ,” He interjected hastily, scratching the back of his neck. “We’re just friends, well closer than friends but it isn’t like _that_.”

Gai happily sobbed, reaching for Kakashi’s hand, “Seeing you two happy makes me burst with joy!”

Genma grinned, toothpick in his mouth moving as he leaned over and clapped his hand on Kakashi’s shoulder. “Hatake’s got a girlfriend,” He sang.

Kakashi just shook his head, smiling slightly. “Not a girlfriend, we’re just… together.” 

. . .

Kakashi came over bearing gifts, his arms full of pizza and chips and bags of candy that he smiled sheepishly over the pile, greeting her with a, “Happy Halloween.”

Sakura was laughing as she let him inside, taking the ice cream and putting it in the freezer. “I thought you were coming later,” She called, “You’re on time today,”

She heard him laugh from her bedroom, before he came back into sight, shirtless and in sweats, no mask. Sakura would never get used to seeing him so… bare. He wasn’t muscular like Kiba or ganguly like Shika. He was lean muscled with slight definition and smooth, soft skin. He was tall and elegant and beautiful. Incredibly handsome. 

“Take a picture Doctor, it’ll last longer,” He teased, coming to lean on her island.

“A picture doesn’t capture a tenth of the real thing,” She said airly, grinning at him as she flipped open the pizza box, taking three slices for herself while Kakashi picked up two and she made her way to the couch, glancing behind her when he stopped, noticing the pictures she had hung on the wall again. 

She had finally had the courage to put it up. Ino had helped her while Sai made sure they were centered and straight. 

The largest was of her family, all mid laugh with flushed faces and striking a pose when they were on vacation a few years back. Her mother’s dark hair was pulled back in a sloppy ponytail as she had her arms both Sakura and Akiro’s necks, lugging them down to her size. Her father stood in the back holding up two peace signs with a wide grin, pink hair messy. 

The second largest was a group picture of their friends, all gathered in her living room for Sakura’s surprise party when she turned twenty-one. Naruto and Kiba were kissing her cheeks, Ino’s chin rested on her head while Sai stood a bit awkwardly and flashed a thumbs up next to Hinata and Shino, who were laughing. Shikamaru had his arm around Temari while Neji, Lee, and Tenten all crouched down in front of her. Chouji had taken the picture, his peace sign in the frame to the far left. 

The rest were smaller pictures, both of her family and friends from varying ages and different places. One of her and Naruto as teenagers with braces and pimples bickering over the last slice of pizza. Another of her and Akiro sleeping in the car when they were small. One of her family and friends at her graduation, Lee and Naruto crying happy tears. 

“Tell me about them?” He asked softly, slowly looking towards her.

She sets her pizza down before going to unhook the picture of her graduation from the wall, nodding to the couch. He sits down with an arm around her shoulders as she pointed to Naruto, “Let’s start with my friends first, since you’ll probably be meeting them sooner than either of us would like,” She smiled up at him, taking a bite of her food.

She told him about her friends as they ate. Telling him about Naruto and how they’ve been best friends since they were kids. “He’s a real knucklehead and can be completely stupid at times but he’s the most loyal and persistent person you’ll ever meet.” She smiles. “He’s loud and dependable and I love him. He’s the one that barged in here after… when I drank and forced me up and helped me clean, made sure I drank water and got to the gym.”

She moved to Kiba, laughing as she recounted his many trials and errors when it came to flirting and women but now he was a smooth talker and had a thirst for a good fight. “He’s really protective, well all the boys are, if I’m being honest. He knows how to party and how to give the best hugs. We met in middle school and I adore his dog.” Sakura peeked up at him and he smiled at her before she went on. “Kiba… Kiba was the one to find when I was drunk, he was always there at the bars or prying bottles from my hands and making sure I got home. He usually stayed the night to make sure I didn’t choke on my own vomit. He found me after the airport and drove me home.” She didn’t have to look up to guess what his face would look like, stony and thoughtful. Kakashi’s arm tightened around her. 

She pointed to Sai, a ghost of a smile on her lips. Sai, she explains, was like the annoying little brother who just doesn’t know social cues. Kakashi laughed at that and Sakura’s heart squeezed. Him and Kakashi would get along, she was sure of it. “He and Ino have been going out for a while now, since the end of high school. He’s kind of a dick, has weird yet endearing nicknames for everyone,” She chuckles a little, looking up at him shyly. “He’s the tattoo artist, every single piece on me was either him trying something new out for him or owing me a favor. Sai… Sai has always been the one to come and force me to eat, he’s very observant and doesn’t have a filter so he knew when I was losing weight or something. Came barging into my apartment and stuffied my fridge full of food, would come to the hospital and hunt me down, even if I was in the middle of a surgery with no shame. He’s sweet in his own way,”

“Shikamaru is lazy,” She drawls, pointing to the next man who looked bored out of his mind if it weren’t for the proud look in his eye as he side—eyed Sakura. Sakura's tells Kakashi about her genius of a friend, how he was supposed to take up the head of his family’s big time company but would rather play chess and nap. “He’s the one that changed my locks and my number and everything. He’s a good guy,” Kakashi buried his nose in her hair and she giggled slightly. 

“And now Ino,” Kakashi murmured and Sakura felt her face flush as she laughed lightly.

“Best for last as some would say,” She quipped. Ino and her had not started off on the right foot. Too busy bullying each other until they just… stopped. They’d been inseparable ever since, been there for boys and fights and drama, every step of the way. “In all honesty we started doing classes at the Dojo so we could legally beat the shit out of each other,” Kakashi barked out a laugh and Sakura grinned at him. “Ino has always been there and she’s like a bad zit, never leaving. I love her with all my heart. She’s a nosy bitch though,”

She felt her eyes drooping as she yawned, leaning into Kakashi fully as he massaged her neck, “Tell me the rest tomorrow?”

She nods sleepily as she sets the picture on the coffee table as she felt herself being lifted, eyes flying wide. 

Kakashi smiled at her, pressing a kiss to her forehead as he carried her to her (their) bedroom, laying them both down. She pulled him on top of her, his head resting on her heart. 

And as she fell asleep, she realized she loved him. 

  
  


Of course, as their luck would have it, she didn’t get to tell him about her parents the next morning. 

“Guys take a picture!” Someone whispered and there was the tell tale of a picture being taken before Sakura slowly opened her eyes, her cheek being tickled by soft hair before she realized what was going on.

“Fuck,” She muttered, glaring at her friends as they all stared at her and the sleeping man on her. Luckily, Kakashi’s face was hidden in her neck. She scowled at her friends, lip curling, “ _Scram_ ,” She snapped and the boys did just that.

“We brought bagels!’ Naruto chirped.

“And donuts!” Kiba added.

“Coffee!” Ino called from the kitchen. 

Kakashi’s breathing stuttered and he hummed deep in his chest, lips moving against her neck, “They’ve found us,”

(She tried to ignore the goosebumps that erupted and the _wanting_ of his lips on her neck, of him everywhere.)

Sakura laughed dryly, running her hands through his hair before reaching over to the bedside table and grabbing his mask and handing it to him, sitting up and stretching her arms above her head. “They have donuts, bagels, coffee, and tea,” She repeated. 

“Oh my!” Kakashi smiled, slipping off of her and standing up in a fluid motion, offering her a hand. He went to put a shirt on, joints cracking before he turned back towards her. 

She pulled him down to kiss his temple and murmur a good morning before dragging him into her kitchen, where her friends were waiting expectantly.

“Hello assholes,” She greeted, “This is Kakashi, introduce yourselves and play nice,” She warned, grabbing her coffee and two donuts as the wolves descended.

Kakashi took it all in stride, matching the much too firm handshake the boys gave him, in which Kiba and Naruto nodded in approval while Sai gave Kakashi a slightly threatening smile and Shikamaru shrugged. Ino was giggling and inviting him to the counter, offering whatever food they brought as a peace offering. 

(Sakura caught his eye over the chaos that her friends brought over and he winked at her. 

And when she flushed a brilliant pink, his smile only sharpened.)

Chaos was what her friends were, she thought dryly as Naurto almost burned her kitchen down with the toaster, Ino barged into her room and shrieked that most of her clothes were missing. Kiba and Sai were sizing up Kakashi, forcing him to add their numbers to his phone and, thankfully, Shikamaru was the only normal one of their group with his arm around her shoulders, shaking his head at everyone else. 

“What a drag,” He muttered. “You’d think they were raised in a fucking barn,”

She took a bite of her second bagel and shrugged, “They _are_ basically animals,” 

Kakashi made his way to her at one point, nodding to Shikamaru who sauntered off somewhere with a kiss to her temple and a lingering look at Kakashi. “I’m sorry they’re terrible,” She murmurs, arm snaking around his waist.

He gave her an amused smile, “I forget how much I like the noise sometimes. It's always nice for a change of pace and your friends… they’re all so _lively_.”

Sakura snorts, rolling her eyes as she looked up at him, “Yeah, that’s one way to put it.” She patted his chest, glancing at the clock, “Shit, you need to get home to the boys. I’ll call you, feel free to take whatever,”

Kakashi snagged two bagels and she helped him put them into a ziplock bag, then one of her tote ones so they couldn’t fly away on his bike. 

(He had shown her his motorcycle, a gleaming black thing that had her eyes wide. He had yet to let her on it though, much to her disappointment and his amusement.)

He surprised her by tugging down his mask and kissing her forehead as a goodbye, waving to everyone else.

“I like him!” Naruto declared.

“Seems good enough to me,” Kiba mumbled.

“He seems very attractive and attentive.” Sai commented, “He seemed to be very enamoured with Hag too.”

Shika just nodded, “Looks like a good guy,”

Ino beamed then fluttered over to Sakura, moaning, “You have to keep him!” 

Sakura laughed and smiled, “I plan too.”

. . .

He gets the text from Naruto. 

(Well, more like the group chat he had been added in named, ‘Sakura Protection Group’ that Naruto had texted into.

It was odd… really just weird that Sakura’s friend group had just simply adopted him without a second thought, even despite his age.

It was… nice too.) 

Sakura had lost a patient today.

A warning for Sai that she would be sent home early and show up at his parlor. But also served as the answer to where he could find Sakura. 

It was past noon when he had finally found the tattoo parlor Sai worked at.

(And yes, he did do a background check just to find out. It would have been weird to just ask.

Obito was teasing him mercifully for being an awkward old man.)

The bell chimed softly when he walked in. It was a small place, homey and lived in with wide windows, plastic chairs, and music playing in the background. The receptionist looked up at him and smiled, “Hello sir, do you have an appointment?”

He opened his mouth to answer before Sai was there, studying him with an impassive face before motioning with his head for Kakashi to follow. Sakura had been right, Sai was strange, but something about him made Kakashi feel so _fond_.

“How is she?” Kakashi asked, hands shoved into his pockets, shoulders slouching as Sai led him down the short hallway. 

“She’s sleeping right now, tattoos always put her to sleep.” Sai answered unhelpfully before he glanced behind him and his mouth ticked up at the look Kakashi gave him. “She gets quiet and gets lost in her head when she loses a patient. She usually pulls herself out of it, but she needs help.”

Kakashi nodded, Sai didn’t seem surprised to find him there, like he was expecting Kakashi to come running when he saw the text. It had surprised Kakashi too, the fact that he had dropped everything and hunted for Sai’s workplace. 

( _Don’t say it._ Kakashi growled.

_Oh, you_ like _her!_ Rin grinned.)

Sai pushed open the door and Sakura’s bare back greeted him, two names were added to her list, the skin around it an angry red. 

Sato Chizo. 

Hatake Kakashi. 

He froze, blinking before he was shrugging off his jacket and resting it on her shoulders. There were dried tear tracks on her cheeks and lashes but she slept soundly, her breaths even and deep. 

She had told him she only tattooed people she cared about deeply or people she had lost on her back. Some would call it taboo to have another person’s name on you forever, you could regret it, as Sakura said she had one name she wished she hadn’t gotten. 

He turned to Sai, finding the man already putting on a new pair of gloves and cleaning the needles with delicate care. The look Sai gave him was knowing and understanding. The way that Sakura and him often looked at each other. 

He understood then, why Sakura said that they would get along. 

Sakura woke up halfway through Kakashi’s second tattoo, drowsy and yawning, drawing his jacket closer to her as she sat up (She always looked so cute when she woke up, eyes glazed and there's a flush to her cheeks). Sakura zeroed in on him immediately, tired eyes roving over where Sai was tattooing and then meeting his. 

Her smile was small and Kakashi could have sworn he heard a relieved breath come from Sai. 

“So, what is the Detective getting?” she asked and the hoarseness of her voice made Kakashi’s heart crack. He knew he could never protect her from death, knew that she made her choice to be in the career to save people. But he wished, almost foolishly, that she would never have to suffer that pain again. 

Kakashi studied her as she turned her back and pulled on her clothes again before dragging the chair towards him, taking his hand in her’s. 

Sai didn’t answer her question and neither did Kakashi, but the face she made when she was the sakura tree creeping from his shoulder blade to his bicep almost made his heart burst. 

. . .

(The next tattoo Sakura got was two weeks later. 

Three howling wolves, all sharp lines and bold strokes, hidden by her hair. 

She cut more than a foot of hair off the next day, the pink strands brushing just below her chin, the underhalf shaven. She made sure to have it tied up the next time she saw Kakashi. 

She swore he almost kissed her and she wished that he had.)

. . . 

They go to the cemetery individually. 

Kakashi ends up there before he goes home (or wherever Sakura was, because she was home.). He pays his respects to the Harunos first, noting the new flowers on their graves before turning to his friends, each with their own bouquet.

He smiles slightly and he knows that Rin would be extremely pleased while Obito would probably be a blushing mess. The thought itself makes Kakashi laugh to himself, kneeling down into the soft earth. 

“Hey you two,” A pause as he traces circles into the dirt. “I’ve been better. I’m sure you’ve heard from Sakura recently, considering the flowers.” His stomach lurches suddenly, heart clenching. And then he admits, “I miss you.” It's silent, just a breath but the moment he says it his fists tighten. 

“I’m always going to miss you. Always. I’ll think about you when I get brownies or when I solve a case. Whenever I get that beer we all liked. I miss Rin’s forced hugs and I miss your laughter and warmth.”

_Say it._ Rin encouraged gently. 

_Tell us._ Obito all but demands. 

“I think I love her and I think that you would have too. Rin you would adore her because she’s fierce and strong. She gives no shit but she’s emotional and caring and she loves with her whole heart.

“Obito you would love her because she’s short like Rin but would kick your ass. She’s hilarious and teasing but she’s so perceptive and nurturing.” He chokes a little, laughing. And he feels weightless and light and

and without grief and without the world on his shoulders. 

_Love,_ Obito and Rin agree.

. . . 

Ino was in Sai’s lap when they heard the low rumble of an engine approach and then shut off. 

“Kura’s here!” Naruto crows, dancing in front of the grill as he waved the tongs around. Ino and Sai exchanged the same look before she was looking at the side gate, waiting to see Sakura and her Kakashi.

They had a strange dynamic, from the few times she had seen them together. If one moved, even just a bit, the other did, like magnets. Kakashi was always watching Sakura, his eyes soft and posture relaxed when she was near.

And Sakura was always near Kakashi, body somehow facing him, hands brushing his arms, secrets smiles and the way her best friend’s eyes _dazzled._ She wondered if her and Sai were like that. 

Sakura and Kakashi came in, Sakura’s eyes bright with life and her hair mused probably from the helmet she had worn. Kakashi smiled at her, going to try and pat the strands down. 

She had been surprised when Sakura sent the picture of her new haircut to the group chat, but it looked good on her, really good. And of course, Ino hadn’t missed the new tattoo Sakura had gotten, going to drill Sai about it. 

But it had been such a long time since she’d seen Sakura so… happy. Unfiltered smiles and loud laughs as she held Kakashi’s hands and shoved at Kiba who went to sloppily kiss her cheek. 

Sai wrapped his arms around her waist, chin resting on her shoulder. “She’s better.” he stated and Ino hummed in agreement. 

“She hasn’t been like this since college,” Ino murmured. “They’re good for each other. Really good.” 

And she liked Kakashi. He was aloof and a bit antisocial (usually had a book with him whenever he came that he liked to bury his nose in) but he was friendly and he made Sakura happy. 

“If he makes her cry,” Ino warned, glancing at the way Sakura smiled softly at Kakashi while Kakashi winked at her. 

“We’ll let you have the first go,” Sai confirms and Ino remembers why she loves him so much. 

(Thankfully it never came down to that because the group of ragtag friends found themselves utterly attached to Sakura’s Kakashi.)

. . .

Sakura and Ino went after each other with such ferocity that Kakashi flinched at each blow. It was like watching two wild cats fight; unmerciful and absolutely brutal. They stalked around each other before meeting in the middle, the crowd around them cheering and yelling.

Sakura came up victorious, holding Ino down in a choke hold until she tapped three times, rising in one fluid motion, her jade eyes gleaming with a predator’s satisfaction.

It was both the hottest and terrifying thing Kakashi had ever seen.

Naruto grinned at him, “Scared, Kakashi? You should be.” Naruto whistles loudly as Ino and Sakura shake hands, the two women grinning at each other fiercely. And Kakashi remembers why exactly the two ladies had started taking these combat classes. Terrifying.

“They call her the Jade Tiger,” Kiba speaks up, holding out his hand as some guys handed him money from the bets. “The only person who truly gives her a run for her money is Naruto, but even he’s too scared to spar with her.”

Naruto whined, shoulders slumping, “Sakura’s scary! She knows exactly where to hit because of all that time she spent studying anatomy…” 

Kakashi’s eyes widened as Sakura sauntered off the mat, her sports bra dark with sweat and she was wearing the smallest shorts he had ever seen (He had to wonder if she was tempting him on purpose or not… because it was working). Her hair was falling from her half up half down hairstyle, framing her face as she tipped her head back to drink water, slowly sliding her eyes to look at him. 

Kakashi gulped.

Kiba and Naurto were laughing their asses off. 

“Hello Detective,” She purred, stalking towards them, a charming smile on her face.

“Doctor,” He nodded curtly, eyeing her warily. Her smile grew even more.

“Care to join me on the mat?” The question was airly, but there was a challenging look in her eye, something hungry. “You don’t have your cast this time,”

Kakashi sighed, just noticing how quiet the small crowd had gotten before shrugging, “It’s been a while since I’ve had my ass beat, why not?” 

The crowd cheered, Gai coming over with joyful tears running down his face and Genma slapped his back with pride. What had he gotten himself into?

“Kick his ass, Petal!” Genma cheered. The rest of Sakura’s friends were yelling her name in encouragement, others offering him looks of sympathy.

When he peeled off his shirt, he didn’t miss the way Sakura eyed him as if she wanted to devour him whole (and if _he_ was trying to tempt her, sue him). He didn’t hear the gasps from the ladies or the mutters from the guys. Sakura licked her lips before stepping backwards, inviting him and he followed, eyes never leaving hers. 

“I’ll go easy on you,” She teased, before she was rolling her shoulders and sliding into a stance.

It was more of a dance, really. 

He used to box for fun, something he and Obito did but fighting with Sakura was much different. 

She moved with such speed and viciousness that he barely had time to dodge or even think of blocking. They got into a rhythm at one point, his heart pounding in his ears as he got a few god swipes and hits in, and she was smiling at him. Panting through her teeth, her eyes light filled and it was like they were dancing. 

And then her leg swept his from under him and he went down. 

He stared at her as she raised her fists in victory, teeth gleaming and then she looked at him and his chest exploded with such a strong and hot emotion. 

_Love,_ Rin supplied, warmly.

He grabbed her hand when she offered it and neither of them let go, staring at one another. 

“Hey,” She breathed. “You could be really good if you trained some more,”

“Hey yourself,” He panted, running his other hand through his hair. “Thought you said you were going easy on me,”

She laughed, throwing her head back and he couldn’t help but stare. “I was,” She poked his bare chest. “I know how to respect my elders.” A pause. “We should do this more.”

“Dr.Haruno, if you want me shirtless, all you have to do is ask.” 

She swatted his arm as Kiba yelled, “C’mon lovebirds, let someone else have the spotlight,”

Kakashi grinned and Sakura laughed again. Neither of them let go of each other’s hand that night.

. . .

“Sakura.” Naruto called as he pushed open the door, his voice grave. “He’s back.”

Sakura dropped the cup she was washing, turning to look at Naruto with narrowed eyes, “I’m over him Naruto,”

Naruto sighed, closing the door behind him, “I know that, we all know that, but he doesn’t. And apparently he’s been asking for you. So, just be careful.”

Sakura nodded and Naruto found himself on her couch, flipping through channels. 

“Thank you for telling me,” She called softly. 

Naruto didn’t smile, just looked over, “If that asshole comes anywhere near you I’ll beat him into next year.” 

. . .

He showed up at her door a week later, just an hour after Naurto had left. She had opened the door and there he was, clad in a black dress shirt and pants. “I’ve been trying to text you.”

Sakura went to slam the door but his foot was there and he forced the door open. Her heart was beating out her chest as she snarled at him, “I changed it for a reason.” 

Sasuke glowered at her and then he was moving, grabbing her wrists and pulling her towards him. 

Kissing him felt like drowning, as if the bruising hands on her wrists were holding her underwater while she thrashed and fought. She pulled away harshly, wiping at her mouth before she punched him, sending Sauske to his knees. " _Fuck you_ . Fuck you for thinking you could come back here. Fuck you for kissing me. We are _never_ getting back together. Leave me the fuck alone. _And get the fuck out_." 

Sasuke glowered at her from where he was, slowly getting to his feet. “You’re lucky I even came back,” He spat. “You’re lucky I even wanted to try and do this again, to try and love you.” He didn’t dare come closer but his words felt like a physical blow. “Who the fuck would want to love someone like you? Someone weak and so emotional. Someone who kills the people around her?” He scoffed, rubbing at his broken nose before he was gone. 

The slamming of the apartment door didn’t even register through the static in her head. 

She fell to her knees, gasping and sobbing as she clutched at herself, staring out the window as it stormed and stormed and stormed. 

Someone like her.

Someone who kills the people around her.

She sobbed into her knees, rocking back and forth as it thundered and her newly healed heart cracked and splintered.

. . .

"What the fuck did you say to her?" Naruto snarled, grabbing a fist full of Sasuke's shirt, spitting in his face. 

"We know you did something _Uchiha_." Kiba growled from behind as Naruto shoved his way into Sasuke's apartment, dragging the asshole behind him. 

Sai and Shikamaru stalked behind them, slamming the door shut. Naruto pushed Sasuke into a chair, in his face again. "She won't eat. She refuses to come out of her apartment. She isn't answering texts or calls. _What the fuck did you do to her_?" 

Sasuke glared, "Why does it matter? She’s the same she's always been, dramatic, self centered, we—"

Sai punched him in the face before any of the other guys could stop him, hands around Sasuke's neck and he _squeezed_ as Kiba and Shikamaru pulled him away, struggling to restrain him. 

A heavy silence settled among the men, eyeing Sai and Sasuke warily. Sai had never acted like that, had never laid a violent hand on anyone. 

"Sakura lost her parents to a car accident nine months ago. Eleven months after you left her in the rain, left her _alone_ ." Sai spoke, still fighting against Shikamaru and Kiba, lip curled. "She was alone but then she was getting better, she blamed herself for their deaths. Like she always does. But then she was getting better, she was becoming _happy_ . She was going out more, she began to eat again, began to slowly come alive. _Sakura is the strongest of us_ ." Sai's breath was ragged, his eyes livid. "And then you came and _fucked it up_." 

It was quiet as Sai straightened and stopped fighting, shooting Kiba and Shika a look that had them dropping their hands. 

Shikamaru leaned against the wall, cigarette in hand, "She started drinking you know. To cope with all the shit you did and what you didn’t do." 

“You better start talking Uchiha. I don’t give a shit if you’re rich or important, I’ll fuck your face up like I did when we were kids,” Kiba barked, face twisted up in a sneer. There was a dark bruise on Sasuke’s face, blood seeping from his nose.

"I kissed her." Sasuke said simply and the air shifted, turning electric. The boys knew that Sakura and Sasuke’s relationship had been toxic and borderline abusive. She had cried over him for months, telling them about what happened behind closed doors. He wouldn’t touch her, wouldn't kiss her, wouldn’t even look at her when they were alone. 

Sakura had someone new, someone good. Someone who cherished her and made her happy, someone who understood her completely. "She broke my nose and told me to fuck off. So I told her…" His voice died before Sasuke continued, "I told her she was lucky that I chose to come back to her because—"

Naruto punched the wall next to Sasuke's face so hard there was a gaping hole. "You're a fucking _bastard_. Don't ever come near her again, I don't want to ever fucking see your face." 

Naruto stormed out of the room, Kiba pining Sasuke with a feral glare and curling of his lip. Sai didn't look at him and simply strode out, his knuckles bruising ever so slightly. Shikamaru paused, looking over his shoulder at Sasuke who looked so… lost. 

"Rot in hell Uchiha. It's the best thing you've got going for you." 

. . .

Sakura wasn’t at home when they came knocking and then barged in. The place was cold and empty, the only sign of life were the unwashed mugs that sat in her sink. 

Shikamaru was the one to dispel the tension, “Give her time. She’ll come back when she’s ready. Plus, we all know where she is.”

They all nodded, she would be safe with him. 

. . . 

She was standing at his doorstep, drenched from the rain, just like the first night. Her eyes were bloodshot and there were fresh tears sliding down her pale face, eyes blank.

Anger rose up fist, wondering who would do this to his Sakura. Then concern because she hadn’t cried like this in _months_. He reached for her, pulling her soundly to his chest as she whispered, 

“How many ghosts haunt you?”

His voice was hoarse, he barely breathed, 

“There are too many to count.” 

She only nodded at the response. Understanding. She always understood him, just like him to her. 

She sobbed against him, hands curling into his shirt. “It isn’t our fault,” She trembled. “It isn’t our fault. We don’t control it and it isn’t our fault.” 

He didn’t know what to say, so he held her, closing the door and resting his chin on her head. Until she pulled back, shivering and her skin pale and flushed, “We save lives Kakashi,” Her voice broke and Kakashi had never heard such a wretched, heartbreaking sound. “ _We save lives_.”

He found himself repeating her words, arms tightening around her. “We save lives,” He breathed. And then she looked up at him, with tears running down her face and her hair plastered to her head and 

he 

couldn’t

_breath_. 

She looked so fierce, so relentless She looked at him, her eyes _burning_ , nodding her encouragement and—oh. _Oh_. This was what it was like. Now he remembered. The feeling of being loved, the feeling of loving someone. 

There is an intimacy of being understood. 

To have someone know you beyond your skin, to have someone know your marrow and blood. To look deep into you, look at you as a whole, to trust someone enough, let them see your bare soul— and they still love you.

It made him dizzy, his head filling with herher _her_. 

(His heart was no longer held together with cheap glue and bandaids. It was healed, fully and beating.)

“It isn’t our fault,” He murmured, tipping her head up so they were eye to eye. Her eyes were bright with emotion and life and challenge. “We don’t control it and we save lives.”

( _Alive_ . He mused. _Resurrected_.)

She nodded, relaxing against him, cheek against his chest as he stroked her back. She was shivering now, her grip on him loosening as she calmed. He traced her spine idly, letting silence blanket them for the moment.

“Do you want some coffee? Or a shower?” He asked her and she smiled at him again, as if he were her saving grace, as if he was the reason she was alive again. 

“Please,” She nodded, swallowing thickly before looking down at the ground sheepishly, “I’m sorry about your floor,”

Kakashi stared at her, stared at the doctor that had saved his life, at the woman who stitched him back together, at the person who was loud and brimming with _everything_. And then he laughed, barked out the noise so loud and raw that his dogs came stumbling down the steps.

And Sakura… Sakura just stared at him with wide, green eyes before she was laughing too. First small giggles and then she was laughing, hand reaching for him and squeezing. 

He was leaning down before he could control himself, swallowing her laughs and smile. 

. . .

Kissing him felt like breathing, as if the gentleness of his fingers in her hair was her freedom, the way his lips were firm and chapped were revelation. She broke apart, panting slightly as she leaned her head on his chest, arms around his waist. "Thank you," She breathed, his fingers carding through her hair. 

“Thank _you_ ,” He replied just as soft. He didn’t ask questions, she would tell him some time or another. 

Sakura leaned back, tugging him down to her again, lips smoldering, kissing him like she was drowning and he was air, kissing him like she's wanted to for a very long time— then he was pulling away. “You’ll get sick,”

(Distantly she remembered those were the first words he said to her and it made her heart sing.)

“Join me in the shower then,” She murmured and his grip tightened on her, a gleam in his eyes.

They took a long, hot shower, exploring each other’s skin, hands hot and branding. She cried out his name clawing at his back and he did the same, muffling the sound as he kissed her sloppily and unhurriedly, the water raining down on them. It was a while before they came stumbling out of the bathroom, Sakura wearing just Kakashi’s shirt and Kakashi dressed in low riding sweats.

They ate leftovers and drank soda with the dogs begging for scraps, and then they tumbled into bed, like they usually did tracing shapes into each other’s skin before they fell asleep. 

It felt like coming home.

It felt like coming alive.

. . .

She moved out of her apartment slowly enough that even she didn’t notice until Naruto commented on the fact that her friends spent more time at her place than she did. 

It was just an unspoken thing between Kakashi and Sakura, they didn’t have to talk about her coming there after work, they didn’t have to talk about them just being together, they just knew that the other knew. 

So, it just kind of happened. Sakura didn’t renew her lease, packed up the rest of her things and then it was official. They were _together_ . They lived together, laughed, kissed (a lot, and she would never tire of it. Never get over the flush of his face, the way he has to lean down for her. She loves it and she wants to devour him _whole_ ), walked the dogs, and it was the exact same. 

The only difference was now, she heard many complaints from her friends that now they had nowhere else to hang out. Of course, that didn’t exactly stop them from showing up at the doorstep, soda and boxes of food in hand.

Sakura was extremely lucky and very fortunate that Kakashi was _nice._ And yes, he was a bit gruff and antisocial and grumpy when hungry, but he didn’t mind the fact that her friends loved her and that they liked him enough to bring him his favorite coffee and slap his back with praise. 

And so, Sakura was happy. And she was alive. And Kakashi was there with her, feeling the same. 

And it was home. 

. . . 

Sakura had found his little hidden library, much to his reluctance. Grinning like a cat when he came home to find her surrounded by books, cute glasses perched on her nose. 

"You have all these books and still no book club?"

"You really aren't gonna let that go, are you?" 

She snickered at him, the sun catching her eyes and her smile.

God, he loved her.

. . .

Work was busy for the both of them. 

He and Genma got assigned a new case, a serial killer that left calling cards with their names on it. A copycat sent to make fun of them and goad them. 

(But he was not the same guilt ridden, anger driven man he once was.)

Sakura was kept at the hospitals most days, having long term patients who she needed to console, families to comfort, and Tsunade had her running ragged. 

(But she was not the same self-blaming, grief filled woman she once was.)

They always came home, always made time for each other. He brought her coffee and she made him lunch. And it was perfect.

. . .

When he got to the hospital he was half dead. 

Sakura stood frozen to the spot when she was called in, a freezing cold numbing her as she rushed forward, eyes impossibly wide and breath caught in her throat. So much blood. _What the hell had happened?_

“Sakura,” He gasped and she was there, running next to the gurney shouting and barking orders, his blooded, shaking hand grasping her weakly. “Sakura,” 

“Save your energy,” She snapped, breaths coming too fast, “You’re going to be fine. Save your energy.”

She knew what he was going to say before he said it, tears streaming down her face. As the words sunk into her, ripping her apart but she held herself together, she couldn’t break down, she couldn’t crack.

(She would bleed all over the shattered glass, she would cut herself picking up the pieces but she would _not break._ ) 

_“I love you.”_

“Shut up,” She rasped, “Shut up and tell me when you wake up, Kakashi.” They turned the corner and the OR was right there. “We still need to give Bull a bath, remember? We still need to start that stupid book club.”

His eyes were closed but there was a smile, his eyes crinkling.

“Dr.Haruno you’re too close to the patient for this—”

“He is _mine_ .” She snarled as they rolled Kakashi into the OR. “He is mine and if you’re going to fight me you can _get out_.”

It took hours. Hours of a steady hand, of repressing and pushing down the emotions that threatened to distract her. She wasn’t sure how long she stood there, how long she worked alongside the others but he was stable now. He was sleeping. He looked like shit and she had never loved someone like this before. 

She stumbled back a step, legs giving out and she heard shouts before everything went black. 

. . .

She woke up in the recliner and found Kakashi looking at her like he was in pain.

Sakura was on her feet in an instant, hurrying to his side and grasping his hand. “What hurts?” She whispered, searching for anything. “You were in really bad shape when you came in.” Her voice shook and her hands did too as he squeezed them. 

And then he spoke, voice grave and hoarse. 

"I'll ruin this, you, you might just die like the rest of them. My hands… everything about me is bloodied and scarred and _broken_." 

The words tore through her, ripping her apart. Because, because this man. The man she loved with everyone she had and would become, still did not think that he deserved the world. 

So she leaned forward and kissed his brow and gave him a soft smile because she knew he was scared, she knew what his fears were, his worries. And she would not hold them against him, they were valid and she went to soothe his ache. 

"I've already been broken, Kakashi. But we're healing. So let me love you, let yourself be happy. Tell me all your sins and I will love you anyways."

And then he was shuddering, pulling her close until he kissed her lips, then her face, shaking hands holding her as she whispered, “Detective Hatake Kakashi, I love you. ”

He sobbed at the words, his forehead resting on her shoulder as he whispered back, “Dr.Haruno Sakura, I love you.”

. . .

It was against protocol and probably wasn’t the best considering his injuries, but Tsunade couldn’t bring herself to wake them.

Her brother in everything but blood hadn’t looked this peaceful even before she had met him after her family had taken him in. And her best (and favorite) surgeon was curled up next to him, face lax and without the furrow or stress that had been present in the previous months. 

She suppressed a smile, going to throw a blanket on top of them before snapping a picture. She would make fun of him later.

Shizune owed her twenty bucks.

. . .

A year passed with more barbeque, more surgeries and cases being closed, more laughter and love, kisses and touches. Then two, then three, and then four. 

The wedding was small, held in their backyard with their closest friends. Ino had taken over when Sakura had shown them the ring, squealing with absolute delight.

(The boys had exchanged a pleased look, since they were the ones who gave their blessings. Kakashi was old fashioned apparently.) 

Their backyard had been cleaned up, the grass mowed down neatly, there were chairs and fairy lights along with a makeshift altar. It was perfect. 

Sakura was in a simple white gown that was backless and displayed the lines of her muscles and the color of her ink. She kept her hair short and buzzed designs underneath her hair, though Ino had pinned it up in a cute bun, weaving her family’s flowers into the hair. 

Kakashi was in his father’s suit, an old thing Sakura had found in the attic and had gotten dry cleaned for him. His hair was swept back and brushed for once, Pakkun sat at his heel while Gai, Tenzo, and Genma were at his side. 

Kakashi had cried when he saw her, his mask dampening as Shiba and Bull walked away and shook flowers onto the ground. Naruto walked Sakura down the aisle and she looked _breathtaking._

She was crying when she got to him, Naruto giving him the widest smile he’d seen before going to take his place with Ino. 

Their hands were shaking as they gripped them and Sakura smiled at him and Kakashi smiled back. Their vows were quick and to the point because they already knew all these things, they whispered them in the middle of the night, talked about them when they walked their dogs.

He yanked down his mask and kissed her, dipping her low to the ground as the small crowd erupted into cheers and champagne was popped along with the soda. 

The sun was setting when the fairy lights flickered on and they took the middle of the yard, his hands on her hips and her arms around his neck. 

“You know,” She said softly, ear on his heart. “It was raining when we met and I had always hated the rain because the rain had taken everything from me.”

He knew this, thumbs stroking circles into her hips, but she continued as they swayed to the music. “But then I met you in the rain and now… now I think I love it.” 

He kissed her again and again and again until she was laughing and flushed. And he didn’t care if anyone saw him without his barrier at that moment, he didn’t care if it had gone silent and there were pictures being taken and Genma had started to tear up. 

“Dr.Hatake,” He murmured, eyes gleaming. 

“Detective Hatake,” She whispered back. And then she pulled away ever so slightly, smiling smugly at him, “So, what about that book club?”

Kakashi laughed as it slowly began to pour, everyone else running inside, Tsunade shouting as she tried to grab as much booze as she could. Thunder rolled through and they stayed where they were, getting thoroughly soaked to the bone.

“You’ll get sick,” She teased, mirth dancing in her eyes. Her eyes that were alive and full of life. She was smiling at him, eyes crinkling and he loved her. He loved her. He loved her. 

Kakashi kissed her again, and everything was perfect.

(They both ended up getting sick.)


End file.
